Pears
Created | Updated Sep 5, 2003
Pears are the fruit of the pear tree and are normally a greeny-grey colour, and are shaped like a bell. They are also believed by many to be the second most annoying fruit on the entire planet (the first being oranges).
The reason why they are believed by many to be the second most annoying fruit on the entire planet is because they take a ridiculously long time to ripen, and then they remain ripe for a pathetically short time before they turn into a brown mushy mess. Pears contain seeds, which are the results of sexual reproduction in a pear tree: it is in fact very rare that the word 'pears' is used in the same sentence as the word 'sexual', so you should be honoured that you have read it and should commit it to memory in case anyone ever asks.
Pears should not be confused with pairs, which is a group of two things, ie 'a pair of hats' means that there are two hats. The phrase ' a pair of trousers' does not mean that there are two garments which humans wear on their legs, it only means one garment which humans wear on their legs. Admittedly, this doesn't make any sense whatsoever, but that's the English language for you. The same principle applies for 'a pair of jeans' and 'a pair of Status Quo fans'. Pears should never be put in pairs, or for that matter Paris, in case something regrettable happens. Paris is the capitol city of France, and Status Quo are a rock group (allegedly).
The reason why they are believed by many to be the second most annoying fruit on the entire planet is because they take a ridiculously long time to ripen, and then they remain ripe for a pathetically short time before they turn into a brown mushy mess. Pears contain seeds, which are the results of sexual reproduction in a pear tree: it is in fact very rare that the word 'pears' is used in the same sentence as the word 'sexual', so you should be honoured that you have read it and should commit it to memory in case anyone ever asks.
Pears should not be confused with pairs, which is a group of two things, ie 'a pair of hats' means that there are two hats. The phrase ' a pair of trousers' does not mean that there are two garments which humans wear on their legs, it only means one garment which humans wear on their legs. Admittedly, this doesn't make any sense whatsoever, but that's the English language for you. The same principle applies for 'a pair of jeans' and 'a pair of Status Quo fans'. Pears should never be put in pairs, or for that matter Paris, in case something regrettable happens. Paris is the capitol city of France, and Status Quo are a rock group (allegedly).
