h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

phrases are very interesting the article gives an insight to the kingdom of mid earth races it is a dream article

Uh huh,

Although I'm not sure that Tolkein's Elves would use most of those phrases much, so it doesn't show much of their charactor!

Although what I'd really be interested in is a glossary of phrases for use with Terry Pratchett's Elves... ("Noble? Kind? Hmm, we only get the OTHER sort of Elves around here")

..."Don't hurt me, I'm a coward"

"Actually my friend over there has REALLY sensitive soles to her feet, she'd be good for the old "rub salt into her feet and let that goat lick it off" trick"

"Can I suggest an interesting one involving a damp knotted bathtowel?"


"Eat iron, you pointy-eared little bastard!"

Actually, Terry Pratchett has given the Discworld treatment to Elves, trolls, dwarves, dragons, men, in such a way that I could never read "Lord of the Rings" with a straight face again. "Lords and Ladies" blows the Elf myth wide open, I think.

It's interesting that the only two major Discworld races shared with Mifddle Earth who HAVEN'T yet had the treatment are Hobbits and Orcs. I know he couldn't CALL them "hobbits", not without incurring a demand for royalties form Tolkien's estate, but it should be fun to see how they're dalt with... and I bet this guy's mind comes up with a twist on Orcs that nobody's thought of before, not even that sub-strand of fantasy fiction that seems devoted to rehabilitiating them.

(Come to think of it, isn't a kind of Ent covered in "The Colour of Magic"?)