Alternative Smiley-Tags

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Smilies have their own meanings and are well-defined at h2g2. Still, they have also been used in a way or context that alters their normal or intended usage.

A prime example of this is the loo brush smiley - cheerup or using smiley - cake to mean cheesecake or smiley - popcorn to denote a change of subject in a long posting. Apart from these general alternative meanings there are times where smilies are (mis-)used to provide specific information; the SBVM's 'battle-marks' is an example of this. Nevertheless, this article is about alternative smiley tags for everyday use. I shall try to give an overview of the alternative uses smilies have been put to on h2g2. This list is by no means complete... feel free to add more definitions in a thread below.

Sorry for all this being a bit tongue-in-cheek, but if one were allowed to talk about the subject matters openly, one would not have to resort to smiley abuse. Poor little fellas!
And a word of caution: If you encounter smiley(-combinations) on-site make sure to check for the context in which a smiley is used to ensure that you catch the correct meaning.... even if that requires reading the backlog.

We shall start off with the cute, clean and innocent ones making our way to the ones used to denote moderateable content. Not all the ones listed below were seen on-site, feel free to find out which.

The Clean Ones

These are encountered quite frequently on h2g2.

smiley - cheerup Loobrush
smiley - steam Celery in Ears (refuses to listen)
smiley - wow Chewing
smiley - puff Chewing, mouth really full
smiley - zoom Harry Potter
smiley - clown Someone who participates in the German Carnival
smiley - moon A pickled onion
smiley - crescentmoon Half-eaten pickled onion
smiley - footprints Wet paint
smiley - fullmoon SBVM's logo (maybe)

Smilies can, of course, be combined to give whole new meaning or even to tell short stories:
smiley - fairysmiley - cake - a fairycake
smiley - moonsmiley - biggrinsmiley - crescentmoonsmiley - puffsmiley - wowsmiley - ok - Someone eating and enjoying one of Shazz' pickled onions.
smiley - marssmiley - biggrinsmiley - puffsmiley - wowsmiley - ok - Someone eating and enjoying a choc snack.

The Corny Ones

Now, let us turn to the smiley - corncoby ones...

smiley - groan, smiley - yuk, smiley - online2longMay all be used as relating to constipation or "Laxobigging" for those who know The Deeper Meaning of Liff well enough
smiley - runThis on the other hand signifies the opposite of constipation
smiley - online2longDesperately waiting at the wrong side of the toiletdoor
smiley - runsmiley - online2longA case of diarrhoea where one did not make it to the loo in time
smiley - weirdElectroduced
smiley - cheersOrdering another pint

So you now might be able to decode this:
smiley - runsmiley - yuksmiley - yuksmiley - yuksmiley - steamsmiley - puffsmiley - yikessmiley - online2longMust have been something I ate! (Thanks to deackie) for that one!)

The Rude Ones

The rude section is fairly short. One reason is that we are all nice people, the other is that it's difficult to abuse all these cute smilies that way.
Still, once we establish that smiley - star is a sphincter muscle, it follows that smiley - starsmiley - musicalnote is the release of body winds. Whereas smiley - kisssmiley - star should be seen as an insult and be moderated.
The guy officially known as scientist might also be a fanatic who wields a pamphlet and a
molotov cocktail... just look at hir: smiley - scientist.
Substance abuse is not unknown either: smiley - weird, smiley - silly, smiley - puff (= bonghit) or smiley - online2long.

The Explicit Ones

Ok, guys and gals, this is the section you have been waiting for. I'll keep the examples somewhat vague, just use your fantasy.

The first ones to be sexually abused were smiley - tickle and smiley - grovel. From my personal knowledge the first instance was posted on 31st of July 2001 [F16294?thread=13004].
smiley - grovel is fairly explicit anyway, but you might be interested to know that it has been referred to as 'Lewinsky' or 'Monica' (which makes smiley - santasmiley - grovel Santa Monica)
smiley - tickle on the other hand was difficult to ascertain. While it might stand for anything two smilies might get up to in dark corners of your computer's RAM, it seems more like a g-spot smiley. Maybe the two will try smiley - cdouble after that?

Staying with the female anatomy for a while...


smiley - cat is fairly obviously a pussy cat, while smiley - blackcat is a black-haired pussy cat. That would make smiley - tongueoutsmiley - cat ... what?
smiley - laugh on the other hand might depict a smiley which has a lot of fun by hirself.

Anyway. The aforementioned actions might lead to a state which is shown here:
smiley - bigeyes, smiley - online2long, smiley - biggrin, smiley - wow, smiley - puff followed by a release of smiley - ghost or maybe smiley - schooloffish and a resulting feeling of smiley - cool or smiley - ill depending on position and preference.


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