h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

If drug withdrawal is called 'going cold turkey', is Internet withdrawal 'going cold mouse'? Just a thought...

Anyway, I admit it - I'm an addict. There are so many people that I keep in touch with via h2g2, e-mail or both, and if I'm deprived of 'Net access then I really miss them! I have had major problems with my home computer recently, and was seriously worried that I might lose my home 'Net access for an extended period. Thankfully, I managed to get my computer fixed. When I got the computer home after it had been repaired, I switched on very nervously, and when I heard the familiar whining noises that signify the modem starting up, I really felt like weeping with relief!

Last year I actually was deprived of home 'Net access for some time due to an unpaid 'phone bill (and guess how I'd run up the bill?) During that time, I regularly visited my local library to use their computers. 'Net access there was limited to 30 minutes at a time, which was nowhere near enough, but better than nothing.

The one loophole in this arrangement was that it was a large library with computers on several different floors, so you could have half an hour on one floor, then go to another floor and have a further half an hour there. On one occasion, I contrived to have a two-hour Internet session by going to four different floors in the same afternoon. Sad, perhaps, but necessary - my h2g2 football pages needed updating!

BTW, I sometimes feel suspicious of that message you get when you shut down a computer - the one that says: 'It's now safe to switch off your computer'. How can it be safe? That means it's time to rejoin the real world!