A Conversation for The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Looking for a towel

Post 41

Mish Prefect

I have tried looking for a towel, only The Guy In Green [yeah, I've met him too!] sold me one, and he said it was a 1st class one!
Hmmmm.....
Bable fish still doesn't translate Spanish though!


Looking for a towel

Post 42

Xaris

Does the Guy in Green sell good towels? I could do with a decent one - I'm retiring my old blue and white stripey one. Oh yes, and does he do mail order?


Looking for a towel

Post 43

Perfectly Average Man

I'm new to hitchhiking, but I have a lovely towel which I think will serve me well. My problems revolve around getting hold of a thumb. Anyone got a spare or know where I can get one cheap?

Also required - 1 spacefaring timetable for the area around the crab nebula


Looking for a towel

Post 44

Atreu3

You can get almost all of your Galaxy hopping needs from The Guy In Green. But as Protagonist said, "Don't buy a bable fish from him!"


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 45

Trillian

The Guild has also requested that if any space traveller comes across a fellow hitchhiker using a towel not made under the strict manufacturing rules of the Galactic Clothing and Material Guild, but who, when questioned on this matter, states that he/she/it purchased the so called 'towel' from a deity (who shall remain nameless), the space traveller should notify the correct authorities immediatly. This is because these fake towels are a direct violation of the Guild's Health and Safety requirements, and are also made by making small fury creatures from Alpha Centauri work in the most appauling conditions.

The Guild wishes to warn all hitchhikers in the galaxy to be wary of pick-pocketing thieves who appear to be normal travellers, but may have lost their own towel through drinking too many pan galactic gargle blasters.


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 46

Zaphods Girl

Loosing towels is a serious offence. I mean the Towel Gods just don't forgive that kind of thing.
Which isn't to say that they won't bother to pester you. Infact they quite enjoy pestering poor interstellar hitch-hikers who have lost their towels.
All right, who took my towel. Come on. Somebody fess up... Oh I had it tied around my waste. Nevermind.


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 47

Researcher 28120

I'm kinda new here so I am in dire need of both a Bablefish and a towel.
Does anyone know a place where I can find these items wholesale?


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 48

Xaris

See the Guy in Green straight away, fellow Hiker. He's just sold me the best towel ever (purple with orange polka dots) at half price and a full five million year guarantee! Oh, and he added a rare Eroticon dialect to my Babel fish's vocabulary!


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 49

Mermaid

I believe there may be a towel snatcher loose in my house. Except it doesn't do me the service of merely stealing my towels. No. Somehow it manages to sneak into my cupboards, and actually USES my towels, turning them into dirty laundry, thus rendering them useless for intergalactic flight, and also keeping me chained to my washing machine.


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 50

Researcher 35569

You should never drink more than two pangalactic gargleblasters unless you are a 30 ton megga elephant
bronchial pneumonia. But if you have lost your towel then I think you should try two and a half.
But remember that ol' janx spirit song........
p.s you could always buy a new towel from your local intergalagtic branch of Marks and Spencers


How many towels are lost exactly?

Post 51

Mish Prefect

Is this turning into some kind of towel-confession chat-show? I for one, have my towel right here with me, and I am greatly suprised by the number of almost-but-not-quite hoopy froods out there who haven't got theirs with them!
And the Guy In Green has set up camp outside my house demanding his rights or something like that after I sued him for selling me a faulty bable-fish!
Does anyone know how to get rid of him??!!!!
Oh, and a line of extremely dodgy second hand towels are now avalible from Mish Enterprises, in several different shades of mouldy green- If anyone's interested.


How many towels are lost exactly?

Post 52

CrazyOne

I've gone right off this towel. smiley - fish


Biros and their relation to towels

Post 53

Himble

Just as Biros will make their way to a special planet where they can live a biroid lifestyle, so will towels if they feel they are not being looked afer properly. This means you should look after your towel better in the future.


How to rid oneself of The Guy in Green!

Post 54

Atreu3

After much researching and determining the velocity at which any humanoid can hurl a rock, I have concluded that in order to get rid of The Guy in Green you must do this.
First find your self a rock. Then get some rope and tie your legs together. After that run... well, hop... out onto your lawn. Hop around him and his camp brandishing the rock and screaming in tounges.
This should definitely make him think you're insane and he will run away... fast.


How to rid oneself of The Guy in Green!

Post 55

Xaris

Try it and let us know if it works, Mish!


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 56

Spider Macavity

I am in the overhead bin. Wher you bin?


Have you seen my towel anywhere?

Post 57

Obi-kadobi

Indeed I do - singing is one of the few ways of ensuring modesty when without towel of course. Anyway why do you ask ?


The Guy in Green will not leave!

Post 58

Mish Prefect

Errr.......
Didn't work Xaris!
Hey, does anyone else know how to get rid of him?
He's just invited himself in for a cup of tea!
I think I may have a permenant house-guest!
HELP!!!!!!!!


The Guy in Green will not leave!

Post 59

Nudge Me Gently

To rid oneself of "The Guy in Green", you must wait until he is seated on a sofa, sipping his tea. In mid sip, place your elbow into his ribs and repeat the following... " And how about your wife, I bet she is a goer... wink wink... nudge nudge... say no more". If he does not leave, his suit may turn greenish brown (mostly harmless tea stain) and could become irritable


The Guy in Green will not leave!

Post 60

Himble

The Guy in Green will leave if you tell him you work for the Guide and that if he doesn't you will reveal certain things about his mother.


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Looking for a towel

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