h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

1: Be socialable and have fun while you are at University. You'll miss it when you leave if you did it right.

2: Don't work too hard at the expense of enjoying yourself especially in your first year when your finding your feet, unless of course you have important work to do for a deadline.

3: Don't worry too much about your first day, once you have got it over with you'll soon forget about the shock of leaving home for a strange and new place and meeting lots of new people you don't necessarily like at first.

4: Learn where you are living in relation to the nearest pub, takeaway, 24hr Spar and bus stop into town. This is obvious yet important advice for the many occasions you will be drunk or otherwise unable to see straight when you need to go home to sleep, eat food, buy Rizzlers and tobacco or meet up with freinds in town.

5: Learn to cook things from scratch. This will enable you to save lots of money on takeaways at every meal and therefore have more money for beer, drugs, fags and university books/equipment.

6: Don't blow your student loan in the first week as this will inevitably lead to you getting into severe debt and not being able to go out or eat decent meals for the rest of the term. Its a bad idea so don't do it.

7: Learn to drink more alcohol than you were previously used to so that you can survive:
a) The inevitable all day drinking session.
b) A house party were "punch" is served.
c) Your first week.
d) Any other occasion that constitutes a excuse to consume large amounts of alcohol. i.e Your time at univeristy.
This is invaluable advice and will enable you to interact far more successfully within the University enviroment.

8: Don't be too quick to judge the new people you meet, your there to make freinds and everyone is in the same boat as you. After a while when everyone has relaxed and got used to being at University they are likely to be completely different people to the one you first met.

9: Try to live peacefully with the people your halls/house. This will cause you much less stress and enable you to have a much more enjoyable experience all round.

10: Keep in touch with your freinds after you have left University. You will regret it if you don't.