h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You neglected to mention the finest, and most skillful of all tube games (with the possible exception of the intricate and precise "sunday morning" variation of Mornington Crescent) and that is Tube Surfing (tm)

To Tube Surf place one foot perpendicular to the direction the tube is travelling and then place your other foot (this game is intended for bipeds only... apologies for being speciesist) up against it to form a T. Then place your hands on you pockets and try and stay upright for as long as possible. Bonus Kudos Points (tm) are gained for negotiating a particularly 'gnarly' sharp break into a station.

Go forth and surf, tubedudes,
Bluebeard.

I've found tube surfing to be a very entertaining way to pass time on transport and actually cut my teeth surfing on the infamous 324 bus route in Sydney, Australia. Nowadays I find further entertainment can be gained from trying to surf and roll a cigarette at the same time on one of those pesky one stop at a time across three lines to get to work. This adds danger to an already heady sport as there is both the risk of collapsing on a sullen tube resident or worse, dropping your tobacco. For extra challenges I like to attempt the works whilst listening to rhythmically asynchronous electronic music.

You surfed the 324??? Whooah.

Yeah tube surfing is an entertaining way to get home after a night out. To add to the fun we have the rule that you have to shout 'wipe out' every time you lose footing and stumble into another passenger.

For the real hard core fraternity, you should try
BAT SURFING !!!
In a similar vein, we hold onto two of the vertical rails to turn upside down. Then hook our feet over the ceiling horisonal rails. Fold your arms and as you sway around the corner try to avoid banging into seats or other passengers.

NB. Best played on the waterloo-city line at 8:30am weekdays.

Has anybody ever tried this on the Waterloo and City Line. Especially Southbound. It's like a rollercoaster. Make sure you standup at the back of the train, and wear protective headgear.

The Docklands Light Railway is good for that too!

Is this thing ever going to be updated again?

Ever tried Ski Jumping on a ferry?

Go to the furtherest forward ppart of the deck accesable to the general public this is normally just beside the bridge but may be on a lower deck. Here the winds are quite strong as they are forcing themselves around the corner away from the flat surface. You can then adopt the classic ski jump position by leaning into the wind. Great fun!!!

I can't get that.

I've tried ferry jumping on skis - didn't get past the poop, cracked my coccyx - very painful.

By the way, the docklands light railway often has no driver, so you can sit at the front of the train. When you get to the entrance of the tunnel going to Bank, stick your hands in the air and squeal. Everyone will think you are on a rollercoaster. For added authenticity, vomit copiously when you get off at Bank.

I was on the DLR yesterday and the conductor came up to the front, opened the little box he's got there and spent the entire trip (Cutty Sark to Bank) pretending to drive the train. Me and my mate had fun going quietly 'You're trying to look important! You're in no more control of this train than I am. You sad bastard!' and other things along those lines.

For added strange looks whilst surfing try "no strap hanging".
This involves standing near to the doors and holding your arm up as if strap hanging whilst not actualy holding on to anything.

You can also play this on the Metrolink in Manchester. Best time is the 5.05pm Metro to Altrincham from St Peters Square. Anybody who catches this regually will know how crowded it gets. Best place to Metro-surf is between G-Mex and Cornbrook. It gets really difficult when
a) There is no rail to hang onto
b) It's match day at Old Trafford and you have to avoid failing into 900 Manchester United Fans!