Jester's Condescending English Dictionary - J

1 Conversation

Back to Introduction/Contents
Jacquin's Postulate
on Democratic
Government
n
No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the
legislature is in session.
Jealosyn
The friendship one woman shares with another.
Jenkinson's Lawn
It won't work.
Jestern
A hoopy frood
Jewish Dileman
Free pork.
Jim Nasium's
Law
n
In a large locker room with hundreds of lockers, the few people
using the facility at any one time will all have lockers next to
each other so that everybody is cramped.
job interviewn
The excruciating process during which personnel officers
separate the wheat from the chaff -- then hire the chaff.
job placementn
Telling your boss what he can do with your job.
joggern
An odd sort of person with a thing for pain.
Johnny Carson's
Definition
n
The smallest interval of time known to man is that which occurs
in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green and the
taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.
Johnny Carson's
Observation
on Geriatrics
n
Sex in the sixties is great, but it improves if you pull
over to the side of the road.
Johnson's
First Law
n
When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the
most inconvenient possible time.
Johnson's lawn
Systems resemble the organizations that create them.
Jones' Motton
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Jones'
First Law
n
Anyone who makes a significant contribution to any field of
endeavor, and stays in that field long enough, becomes an
obstruction to its progress -- in direct proportion to the
importance of their original contribution.
Jones'
Second Law
n
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone
to blame it on.
Juall's Law
on Nice Guys
n
Nice guys don't always finish last; sometimes they don't finish.
Sometimes they don't even get a chance to start!
Justicen
A decision in your favor.

Bookmark on your Personal Space


Entry

A427916

Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry


Disclaimer

h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more