Middelfart is the somehow rather improper name of a medium-sized town on the Danish island of Funen. Originally the name meant 'crossing', because the town is located as near as it could be, without actually being there, to the nearby island of Jutland, separated only by a belt of water. A lot of traffic on this belt resulted in the first settlements, which eventually grew into a market town.

The first known written recordings of Middelfart date back to the 13th Century, when the Danish King Valdemar wanted a close and precise inspection of all his royal estates in the provinces of his kingdom.

Visiting the town can seem to be a bit boring, except for the church which dates back to 1250, and the two enormous bridges, which were erected in 1935 and 1971. There is really very little to see, and most travellers pass through Middelfart, not even noticing the quite remarkable name.

The town is indeed very quiet, and compared to other towns around the world, it can seem almost idyllic and peaceful... until the weekend. If you are looking for an easy night out such as having a few beers, talking to the locals, having a drunken flirt with a member of the opposite sex, you may soon learn that local mating rites often involve violence. A lot of fights have been started this way... and don't think you can talk your way out. Running is your safest option. This may not be the most honourable thing to do, but your opponent probably has more local support than you do.

After surviving the first weekend, you will soon get the sense of the local way of thinking which is rather peculiar in the sense that a true Middelfartian always seems to feel cheated. This is, in fact, understandable enough: during a civil war in Denmark, in 1358, two rebel nobles and their leader were ambushed and killed in Middelfart. Of course, the king swore his own innocence, probably laughing out loud, and declared that the inhabitants of the town should pay a tax for the hideous crime they had committed. Local intellectuals still discuss how poor fishermen could assassinate three fully armoured knights. The tax was paid each year by the town until 1874, when it was finally lifted.

During the 1960s, there was a local fight between Middelfart and the rival town on the other side of the belt. This time it was over the placing of an industrial harbour. Both towns were trying very hard to get the harbour, which would mean a bigger industrial investment and prosperity; but again Middelfart lost and the rival got the harbour. Whether or not Middelfart really got tricked is still an open debate anyone is free to comment on... as long as one is taking Middelfart's side.

Middelfart is, all in all, a nice quiet town, perfectly and utterly stripped of all things dramatic and provocative. Except for the weekend nights, that is.