h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Bear in mind that any time you throw a number of people together and encourage them to drink and have a good time, things have a way of following an increasingly chaotic pattern. Plan the big stuff carefully well in advance: send invitations in good time; make sure the venues concerned are booked (and confirmed); double check that you can feed everybody (not forgetting vegetarians); ensure the bar will be open and properly stocked.

But don't sweat the little stuff. On the day itself, relax and don't fret about anything that doesn't exactly follow your imagined course of events. Just arrange that between them, your best man and chief bridesmaid have a mobile phone, the number of the local taxi firm, a pen and paper, some cash and/or signed blank cheques, and leave them to sort things out. That's what they're for, not just to look good in the photos.

And don't - under ANY circumstances - tell anybody where you're heading on honeymoon. Not even your best friend. Especially not your best friend

Well, the thing that most people forget is that the wedding is only the beginning.... But, for what it's worth here's my twopennorth:

1. think carefully (both of you) about the type of wedding you want. If your parents are to be involved in some way, or at least will attend, it is nice if you don't offend them by doing something that they really hate. Even if they are paying for it, however, it is your wedding - don't ever forget that.

2. Don't organise a wedding in England when you're in Germany and want a registry office. (I did, and wasn't sure right up until three days before that I could have the date and time I wanted)

3. Some people have started putting disposable cameras on the tables at the reception so that afterwards you can have loads of pictures of your nearest & dearest enjoying themselves. Be careful if you have the sort of friends who will do moonies and take photos of that sort of thing. Unless you want to do it yourselves.

4. Don't forget to have some part of your attire that your (future?) offspring can tease you about and show all their friends. (bad haircuts and too-wide or too-narrow lapels are good for grooms)

5. Double, triple, quadruple check everything. Keep it all together in a file, computer or organiser. Get someone else to have a look now and then - you sometimes can't see the big picture when you are concentrating on hundreds of details. Get insurance

6. Remember if you're inviting people with kids that the kids (especially small ones) need to be occupied, but that the parents also want to listen to speeches. (a play corner is a good idea if you can beg borrow or steal a few toys) If you have kids running around, make sure that they aren't running round the wobbly table where your beautiful cake is.....

7. Don't forget to include some of the more boring and everyday things on your present list (washing up stuff, irons, pegs etc etc) these things don't buy themselves, and are really useful. (the most useful thing we received was a washing up bowl with gloves, liquid, soap powder etc, another was a supply of tinned food - for the first couple of weeks...)

8. Enjoy your day. Don't let anyone tell you their disaster stories. It is not the end of the world if you see each other before the ceremony. It isn't the end of the world if the mothers-in-law are wearing the same hat. It is the end of the world if a giant asteroid hits your church half-way through the ceremony. Then you can panic. Even if a "disaster" does happen remember this: in later years you will most probably look back and laugh your socks off.

9. Good luck

I should like "Don't ask your bride's ex-boyfriend to be DJ" to this list. Now, this guy had an excellent reputation as DJ, and he never displayed any hard feelings about his ex and I getting married. Well, he showed up with his new girlfriend, the "I think you all suck" type, and somehow her mood manifested itself in the music he played all night. We had such a good time that day that it hardly mattered, but some of our guests and family were feeling more strongly about it.

I should like to add "Don't ask your bride's ex-boyfriend to be DJ" to this list. Now, this guy had an excellent reputation as DJ, and he never displayed any hard feelings about his ex and I getting married. Well, he showed up with his new girlfriend, the "I think you all suck" type, and somehow her mood manifested itself in the music he played all night. We had such a good time that day that it hardly mattered, but some of our guests and family were feeling more strongly about it.

I am lucky enough to live in the Southwestern US where it is a short plane ride to fabulous Las Vegas! I am getting married in about three weeks and have had a very easy time planning my wedding because of the many weddings chapels in Vegas. I just called and let the chapel know what date we wanted to get married. They scheduled my time and then I picked out a wedding package that includes pictures, videos, flowers and a suite in the hotel/casino for two nights. Then I was transferred to the catering department at the hotel and was faxed choices for packages for my reception. I called after my fiance and I had made our choice and put in our order, including colors for napkins and the cake. We opted to keep the reception alcohol free except for champagne for the toast. The reception will only be about an hour long so everybody can go play at the tables or enjoy a show if they wish. This has been very stress-free and relatively inexpensive compared to the time and money our friends have spent. I can't wait for the day !

Tigger