The Apocalypse: How to prevent it.
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
The Apocalypse is possibly the most feared of all inevitable disasters....the end of the world as we know it. But good people, my research has revealed that it ain't nearly as inevitable as previously thought. In fact, it's very easily avoided.
So, how does one prevent total disater and chaos? Simple, you make up your very own Signs of the Apocalypse. Three or four will do, and make sure that they have little or no chance of ever actually happening. Actually, to be fair to the Apocalypse, have a few that have a slight possibility, and maybe one that has no chance in hell. But don't have only one sign, then you'll just piss the Apocalypse off. Give it a good sporting chance, or it'll come after you personally. Believe me, I learned this from experience. That 2nd rider's horse really does a number on kitchen lineolium.
Anyway,here is an example of an effective set of Signs.
1st sign: 10:15 to baltimore comes on time.
2nd sign: All lost socks are found
3rd sign: Mail comes on sunday.
4th sign: Sadam Hussein dances naked in the town square of Baghdad while making out with a US marine live on CNN.
See, the first three? Perfectly possible...but I've gotten really clever on that fourth one, because Baghdad is a city...not a town.
So, how does one prevent total disater and chaos? Simple, you make up your very own Signs of the Apocalypse. Three or four will do, and make sure that they have little or no chance of ever actually happening. Actually, to be fair to the Apocalypse, have a few that have a slight possibility, and maybe one that has no chance in hell. But don't have only one sign, then you'll just piss the Apocalypse off. Give it a good sporting chance, or it'll come after you personally. Believe me, I learned this from experience. That 2nd rider's horse really does a number on kitchen lineolium.
Anyway,here is an example of an effective set of Signs.
1st sign: 10:15 to baltimore comes on time.
2nd sign: All lost socks are found
3rd sign: Mail comes on sunday.
4th sign: Sadam Hussein dances naked in the town square of Baghdad while making out with a US marine live on CNN.
See, the first three? Perfectly possible...but I've gotten really clever on that fourth one, because Baghdad is a city...not a town.
