A Hammer is a tool designed to smash things.

An adaptation of the stick, a hammer is comprised of two parts: a shaft and a weighted end.

The invention of the hammer occured when a person who was tired of using a stick to smash things tied a rock to the end to add weight and smashing power.

The correct way to operate a hammer is by gripping the shaft and moving your grasping arm in a swinging motion, aiming the weighted end at the object designated for smashing. You can adjust the power of the applied smash by changing the speed of the swing, or by moving your grip on the shaft up or down.

Hammers come in many strengths, from light to heavy.

Some sample uses of hammers are:

• Attitude adjustments
• Smashing toes and fingers
• Smashing food items
• Banging dents in walls and cars
• Bending nails
• Opening closed windows

Some people claim that they use hammers to remove dents and fix things, but I find this highly unlikely.

After a lot of consideration, I believe that hammers are far too dangerous for the average person to use. Hammers should be restricted to specially-trained technicians.