TBWP - Carding the Witch

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I have gotten this question in email more than a few times. I felt it necessary to answer it here. The following is an example of one of the emails I sent in response to this question. If you're under 18 and you're wondering whether or not you should see this film, please take the following seriously.

hi.


My name is [name withheld]. Im 14.


I read your {incredibly long} reply to the blairwitch movie. I was wondering if you could tell me a little more about the movie. I havent seen it yet. I know about and have read your opinion and insights on the film but I still dont know what really goes on. What it is really about and most of all...what the footage was.
please help

should I see it?

[Name Withheld]


Dear [Name Withheld].


I wrote this long thing for a reason. I
firmly believe in talking to teenagers as if they are
people and not "kids" so I'm trying not to talk down
to you. I'm giving it to you straight. I don't wish to
upset you. I'm trying to be as honest as possible.
Please read it all the way through before you get mad
at me. =)


Before I begin, I must preface this with an important
fact: I was once fourteen. There is still a part of my
heart that is fourteen. I don't wanna be preachy here.
I'm trying to be cool, but age admittedly makes me
less cool than you are.


There's a reason why this movie is rated R.


And it's not the reason the MPAA buttholes think it
is. Jack Valenti is a loser and the MPAA is worthless.
It's designed to help parents decide whether or not a
film is good for their children without the parents
having to do any research on their own. Parents should
see this film first, then decide if their children are
ready for it. Most parents don't do that. They just
look at the damn rating and decide from there.


I'm NOT saying you shouldn't see it, and I'm not
saying you should sneak in. I'm saying you should be
cautious. I'm saying you should get your parents or a
legal guardian to reach a decision.


Let me attempt to explain. The first time I saw this
film, I was in line and there were four young people
in line a bit ahead of me. They seemed a bit excite
and flustered simultaneously and were whispering
amongst themselves, laughing. I was within earshot and
couldn't help but overhear: they were going to sneak
in. They got tickets for a movie that was not R, and
then they snuck in to see Blair Witch. They were going
to pull one over on the Old People. They were very
pleased with themselves about this and having a lot of
fun. Now, I'm not the sort of person to report that
kinda stuff. What people choose to do with their own
lives I generally don't get involved.


I should have perhaps, but I remember what it was like
to be 14. I did that sort of thing myself, and had it
been ANY other R rated film ever made, big deal.


Blair Witch is different. It's special.


AFTER the film was over, I got up to leave the theater
after the credits rolled. Most everyone else already
vacated, apparently including those four. I got up and
having enjoyed my first experience with this movie, I
walked out in a mild daze, contemplating what I'd just
experienced. I decided I desperately needed a real
strong coffee from Starbucks, and headed down the
sidewalk.


I passed those four young people on my way to the
coffee shop. They were standing under a tree. Their
smiles and laughter were gone. Actually one of them, a
lass as I recall, sat on a park bench and the others
stood sort of around her, giving each other space.
Their eyes said it all. They stood in silence, looking
back and forth at each other. The lass was looking at
her hands in her lap, crying softly. Not one of them
spoke a word. They had seen the same movie I had seen,
and though I couldn't read their minds or understand
what was going on in their heads, they were
spellbound, and the girl sat there with her hands in
her lap, one of the other boys had his hand on her
shoulder. They were transfixed; almost trapped in
time.


I don't know if it was age or maturity, but they were
honestly 'affected' by this film, perhaps in a way
that no adult could comprehend. The sheer AURA the
four gave off was very cold. They saw something in
this film that went beyond what made them think it was
cool to dress up in black and wear ankhs.


A day may come when you are much older, and someone
younger comes up to you and asks a similar question,
"should I see this?" And you'll find yourself in my
quandry.


At least I hope you sense the quandry. Some adults
forget what it was like. I hope you remember. I refuse
to let go of that part of me that was fourteen.
However, I also face reality that I am in fact
thirty-one. And the fact is, I don't know. I honestly
can't tell you, because I don't know you like those
who love you know you.


When I was 14 I didn't think the years should make a
difference. Now that I'm 31 I'm forced to admit they
do.


You should only see this film if your parents or a
legal guardian say alright, and ideally they should go
see it first without you to insure that it falls
within what they want you to be subjected to. Granted,
if you're anything like I was when I was fourteen, you
don't give a crap what your parents say.


I don't like the MPAA thing. I think it's a bunch of
malarky. However, I'm not your father. What your
parents say regarding Blair Witch should matter more
than what I say. Especially this film, perhaps moreso
than any horror movie ever made.


You can explain to your parents that this movie is
rated R not for violence or nudity, but because of
profanity; most notably the "F" word. I think I can
say that much without ruining the film for you.
There's no gratuitous on-screen violence or nudity.


However, in MY personal opinion it's predominantly an
adult movie for reasons that are not tangible: for
some, this movie haunts long after it's over. It makes
you THINK, and some young people aren't quite mature
enough to handle what the implications of this film
truly are; the questions it poses or the answers it
doesn't offer.


Perhaps you can assume you are mature enough. I only
know you from the email you sent me so I'm not
qualified to decide that. Those who love you, know you
IRL, they can tell you better than myself. You need an
objective opinion.


This film is special. It affects you mentally, based
NOT on what you do see but on what you CAN'T see. It
plays with your head. Some young people may not be
prepared for that.


There are people who see this film, and after it's
over they are laughing, and it doesn't affect them at
all. At least not on the surface - at least not in a
way I can ascertain and perhaps it doesn't affect them
at all. They just see it as a stupid movie and a waste
of their money and they go on with their lives
unaffected.


There are people like myself who find it fascinating
and sense layers of complexity to it: it's a signpost
to the Human Condition, and we want to revisit it.
Maybe it speaks to us on a level that we can't quite
understand. Maybe even I'm not mature enough to handle
it. Perhaps I'm becoming overtly obsessed and this is
unhealthy. I am enjoying myself however. Like a
Rubik's Cube, it's interesting examining all the
variables of this film in my mind. I guess as long as
you're having fun it's okay.


There are people like those four I mentioned before,
who see this film and are forever changed by it,
perhaps not necessarily in a good way. It's NOT fun
for them. They can't understand the double truths of
this film. Maybe they take it too seriously. Maybe it
takes them to some place in their past that they can't
quite resolve for themselves. Maybe they've been there
in a way that no one would understand; a way that they
can't explain.


This isn't an age thing. It's a mentality thing. It's
out of the MPAA's league, but younger people ARE
generally more susceptible, as are more immature
people regardless of age.


I've seen Blair Witch three times now. I plan to go
see it a fourth time tomorrow. I strongly recommend
you see it, when you are ready.


Also, this isn't necessarily a film to experience
alone. You should be with people who love you. People
you love. It's a strange trek to a place on the fringe
of many people's imagination. It rests on the verge of
Mankind's fears. You shouldn't venture there with
strangers. It's more fun if you have a hand to hold
onto.


So talk to your parents or a legal guardian and ask
them to take you. If they're cool with it, by all
means go.


Remember: it's not what we see that frightens us the
most. People tend to fear The Unknown. It's what we
can't see that is most disturbing; it's what's just
out of our reach and lurking out there in the dark
which really frightens us.

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