Of Blue Whales and Man
Created | Updated Mar 22, 2002
It would appear strange that Man considers himself to be the cleverest being on the face of the planet. We may think this for one simple reason: Man can hold a pen. Consider this theory for a moment... we are aware that dolphins are intelligent, and moving along this line we are more than aware that the brain of a Blue Whale is the size of a mini. With such superior intellect we must consider that we hold ourselves above them for one reason, and one reason alone: we can hold a pen.
With this being the case, if we were to trace back the idea that all of the animals of the world were created equal, occasionally asking The Great Architect to move evolution in a certain direction for their species (such as the go-faster spalash adorning the breast of the kingfisher, the uncanny ability for a tiny spider to scare the living daylights out of a fully grown human, and the possibility that the giraffe had been rather drunk when asking to be yellow with brown spots and a really long neck); then it is a perfectly peasible argument to suggest that the blue whale was rather disappointed at NOT being able to hold a pen, and asked for the creation of the 'pen-holder' (a.k.a- Humanity).
For unadulterated ammusement the 'pen holder' was created with the lungs and spine of a quadraped, the webbing of an aquatic creature between fingers and toes, and a strange desire to build large settlements on the world's largest fault line. This fusion was to eventually create the notion that Man has not yet caught up with evolution, since the Human traits are 'obviously' left over from when they crawled from the water to roam the land. This is pure nonsense, and the creation of the species in this way accounts for the rather dotty idea of hunting down every last whale on the planet to make some dodgy herbal concoction... it is simply revenge.
With this being the case, if we were to trace back the idea that all of the animals of the world were created equal, occasionally asking The Great Architect to move evolution in a certain direction for their species (such as the go-faster spalash adorning the breast of the kingfisher, the uncanny ability for a tiny spider to scare the living daylights out of a fully grown human, and the possibility that the giraffe had been rather drunk when asking to be yellow with brown spots and a really long neck); then it is a perfectly peasible argument to suggest that the blue whale was rather disappointed at NOT being able to hold a pen, and asked for the creation of the 'pen-holder' (a.k.a- Humanity).
For unadulterated ammusement the 'pen holder' was created with the lungs and spine of a quadraped, the webbing of an aquatic creature between fingers and toes, and a strange desire to build large settlements on the world's largest fault line. This fusion was to eventually create the notion that Man has not yet caught up with evolution, since the Human traits are 'obviously' left over from when they crawled from the water to roam the land. This is pure nonsense, and the creation of the species in this way accounts for the rather dotty idea of hunting down every last whale on the planet to make some dodgy herbal concoction... it is simply revenge.
