h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Tea.

I think I know why it is (along with other English traditions) such an Enigma.

Have you noticed that only great tea can be made by the residents of the UK, in the UK.

Personally, I do not drink tea. Shocking, yes. Insanity, No. It is a matter between my Tongue and my
Brain, a debate that started years ago. I just leave them too it now. The choice is no longer mine, I
guess I've just accepted it, especially as my Tongue employs my nose as a scout. Tongue and
nose say, we dont like this. Brain says, you did, you used to drink tea. Tongue says, that's before
were were self aware.

Anyway, back to the point. Why can only the Brits make tea, well its the same reason why we do so
many other things 'our way'. Its genetic.
Around the UK is an aura of 'stuffiness' and 'hello old chap'. This causes a distinct mutation in our
DNA, for the better I might add.

Now, the reason I believe this, is due to that fact that (for arguments sake) I dont like or drink tea, yet
try as hard as I may, I can never make a bad cup.

My mum loves it. When I was at university, surviving on a diet of coffee & TV, I never touched or
thought of Tea for years. So, as soon as I get home, step in the door, its,
"oooh make me a cup of tea", so I do.

Hey presto, a perfectly acceptable cup. Obviously not 100% but we are talking in the high 90's here.
See, its genetic.

Further to this, when a Brit is abroad and either makes a cup or buys a cup, its crap!

Finally, because tea leaves are predominantly found and retrieved from countries such as India,
you would think that there would be the source of prime tea making, yet I believe that because of the
fundamental - inter - connectedness of everything, it was destined to be us who are the kings of the tea
kingdom.

Neil