Humongous mug
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Humongous mug(1)
I've been asked to expand on what is known about the humongous mug, well here goes:
Properties:
Weight - roughly 1 kilogram (empty) and double that when full.
Height - 13 cm
Circumference - 35 cm
Capacity - a tad less than 1 liter
Color - Yellow (with a light green lining, a blue-and-orange daisy with green leaves)
When not in use it hangs from a clip on my belt (the belt also contains a secret compartment where I keep a spare towel(2), a leather bag (containing my Swiss army knife(3)), my cell phone and a doodle bag.)
Up till this point in time I have only used it for coffee, but here are a few other uses I can think of:
1. You can use it as a weapon. Anything will think twice after receiving a whack on the head wit a humongous mug.
2. You can put it down upside down and sit on it. This is particularly useful when milking a cow.
3. You can catch the milk in it when you milk the cow; only then you have to find something else to sit on.
4. You can use it as a headrest when you.."..you can sleep under [a towel] beneath the stars.."
5. You can use it to bail water out of a sinking vessel.
6. Like a towel, you can wave it above your head in emergencies as a distress signal.
7. Full or empty, it makes a good paperweight.
8. and doorstop.
9. It could be a handy sun-visor, bit heavy though.
10. You can hide from rain, under it from, ok only some people can.
11. You can use it as a shield when caught up in a stampede of some sort.
12. You can use it to deflect unwanted arrows from cupid or any other archer that has got you in his site.
13. You can swim in it (If you are Stuart Little)
14. You can put your head in it so that nothing can see you.
15. You can use it to pick fruit in.
16. You can use it as a parachute.
17. By pressing it against a wall, you can eavesdrop on any conversation on the other side.
18. If you don't clean it often, you can cultivate a lot of nasties in it.
19. You can store almost anything in it.
Things not to do with a Humongous mug: Don't barter with it, the only thing worthwhile that you could trade it for is a towel, and that you should already have. Don't loose it.
Footnotes:
1 The second most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
2 The most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
3 The third most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
I've been asked to expand on what is known about the humongous mug, well here goes:
Properties:
Weight - roughly 1 kilogram (empty) and double that when full.
Height - 13 cm
Circumference - 35 cm
Capacity - a tad less than 1 liter
Color - Yellow (with a light green lining, a blue-and-orange daisy with green leaves)
When not in use it hangs from a clip on my belt (the belt also contains a secret compartment where I keep a spare towel(2), a leather bag (containing my Swiss army knife(3)), my cell phone and a doodle bag.)
Up till this point in time I have only used it for coffee, but here are a few other uses I can think of:
1. You can use it as a weapon. Anything will think twice after receiving a whack on the head wit a humongous mug.
2. You can put it down upside down and sit on it. This is particularly useful when milking a cow.
3. You can catch the milk in it when you milk the cow; only then you have to find something else to sit on.
4. You can use it as a headrest when you.."..you can sleep under [a towel] beneath the stars.."
5. You can use it to bail water out of a sinking vessel.
6. Like a towel, you can wave it above your head in emergencies as a distress signal.
7. Full or empty, it makes a good paperweight.
8. and doorstop.
9. It could be a handy sun-visor, bit heavy though.
10. You can hide from rain, under it from, ok only some people can.
11. You can use it as a shield when caught up in a stampede of some sort.
12. You can use it to deflect unwanted arrows from cupid or any other archer that has got you in his site.
13. You can swim in it (If you are Stuart Little)
14. You can put your head in it so that nothing can see you.
15. You can use it to pick fruit in.
16. You can use it as a parachute.
17. By pressing it against a wall, you can eavesdrop on any conversation on the other side.
18. If you don't clean it often, you can cultivate a lot of nasties in it.
19. You can store almost anything in it.
Things not to do with a Humongous mug: Don't barter with it, the only thing worthwhile that you could trade it for is a towel, and that you should already have. Don't loose it.
Footnotes:
1 The second most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
2 The most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
3 The third most useful thing for a hitchhiker to carry with him at all times.
