Blind Auditions
Created | Updated Apr 13, 2014
While outlawed by the Geneva Convention, this particularly dehumanizing form of torture is still in common practice throughout the world.
Blind auditions include cattle calls, open calls, and all other audition situations in which the actor does not know the people involved or what to expect until they are smacked in the head with it upon arrival.
Auditions vary wildly in structure and content, though they share some common characteristics. Generally, the torturee (auditioner) is taken from an overcrowded holding pen into a small, poorly ventilated room to face one or more torturers (directors, producers, stage managers). The auditioner is then tricked into performing some degrading act with a false promise of fame, recognition, experience, or wealth, though Las Vegas bookies put the odds of landing a part in a well-paying respectable show at a blind audition at about 5,000 to 1.
Usually, the act consists of either singing a banal song with forced and false conviction the auditioner does not really have or reading trite and nonsensical lines with a forced and false conviction which the auditioner does not really have. Either act amounts to a trampling of, defecation on, and desecration of the auditioner's beloved art. Whether it be the obligatory Shakesperean monologue, cut down to a meaningless minute, or contemporary drivel about somebody or other's terminal cancer, or a showstopper from Cats, the utter lack of appropriate context and restrictive conditions render each and every "audition piece" both laughable and sad.
At other times, one will be given "sides" to read from, which consist of a page or two excerpted from the play, often with no explanation of characters or the situation. The victim is expected to read from these sides with feeling and technique with a stage manager who reads his or her lines in a leaden monotone designed to suck all the air out of the room. Sometimes the torturers stage a complete ambush, handing the actor/victim a side and demanding an immediate performance, without even the opportunity to read through it once. Once again, the key words here would be "laughable" and "sad."
Once the singing/dancing/mugging/hamming is complete, there are three common techniques used by the torturer(s). (1) They will, with heavy disdain and sarcasm, critique the auditioner's performance and ask them to do it again, at which point the auditioner is summarily dismissed. An accute lack of self worth sets in immediately. (2) They will act like they have seen nothing and feel nothing, not even acknowledging the auditioner's presence. An accute lack of self-worth sets in immediately. (3) This is perhaps the most insidious of torture techniques. They will praise without reserve the auditioner's performance and generally lead the auditioner to believe that they are ecstatic and blessed to have been present at such a wonderful event. After the tortue session, the torturers will promptly never call their victim again. In this case, initial euphoria is slowly replaced by an accute lack of self-worth.
A fourth, less common, but equally insidious technique is often referred to, in hushed tones, as "The Callback." A callback occurs when, against all odds, and over all obstacles, (such as typing for age, race, gender, hair color, height, accent, economic class, and personality, as actual ability is never a factor), the torturers take a special interest in their subjects. A callback gets the auditioner/victim one step closer to the coveted "part," and thus is, ironically regarded with enthusiasm. Callbacks occur either the same day or up to several long weeks after the initial session. There are various theories about how to handle a callback. Delusionals of all sorts will purport that the proper technique is to "do the same thing you did in the audition, because that's what they (the torturers) liked," while others will insist that it is preferable to "show them something different." Depending on the level of cruelty of the powers that be, the number of callbacks one may need to go to can be almost limitless. Five, six, seven, ten: whatever it takes to break the hapless actor.
Whichever technique is used, the end result is invariably the same. Plodding down the streets of our cities and towns is a broken, gray, scorned, and dispirited class of people, needlessly cut down before their time by near constant humiliation, criticism, and exhaustion.
Support groups (workshops and classes) for survivors exist, counseling victims to 'be themselves,' 'have fun with it,' 'think of it as a chance to perform,' and 'remember that they're (the torturers) people too.' There is, however, much dispute about the efficacy of the these self-defense techniques and it is generally agreed that the only solution is to stop the inhumane acts entirely. Sadly, as is common in cases of abuse, the victims will often defend their abusers and even their torture, willingly and often eagerly welcome their fate.
Human rights activists have been focusing their attention of late on the cities of New York, Los Angeles, and London as hot spots of abuse, though even a cursory check of any town would turn up abuses.
Blind auditions include cattle calls, open calls, and all other audition situations in which the actor does not know the people involved or what to expect until they are smacked in the head with it upon arrival.
Auditions vary wildly in structure and content, though they share some common characteristics. Generally, the torturee (auditioner) is taken from an overcrowded holding pen into a small, poorly ventilated room to face one or more torturers (directors, producers, stage managers). The auditioner is then tricked into performing some degrading act with a false promise of fame, recognition, experience, or wealth, though Las Vegas bookies put the odds of landing a part in a well-paying respectable show at a blind audition at about 5,000 to 1.
Usually, the act consists of either singing a banal song with forced and false conviction the auditioner does not really have or reading trite and nonsensical lines with a forced and false conviction which the auditioner does not really have. Either act amounts to a trampling of, defecation on, and desecration of the auditioner's beloved art. Whether it be the obligatory Shakesperean monologue, cut down to a meaningless minute, or contemporary drivel about somebody or other's terminal cancer, or a showstopper from Cats, the utter lack of appropriate context and restrictive conditions render each and every "audition piece" both laughable and sad.
At other times, one will be given "sides" to read from, which consist of a page or two excerpted from the play, often with no explanation of characters or the situation. The victim is expected to read from these sides with feeling and technique with a stage manager who reads his or her lines in a leaden monotone designed to suck all the air out of the room. Sometimes the torturers stage a complete ambush, handing the actor/victim a side and demanding an immediate performance, without even the opportunity to read through it once. Once again, the key words here would be "laughable" and "sad."
Once the singing/dancing/mugging/hamming is complete, there are three common techniques used by the torturer(s). (1) They will, with heavy disdain and sarcasm, critique the auditioner's performance and ask them to do it again, at which point the auditioner is summarily dismissed. An accute lack of self worth sets in immediately. (2) They will act like they have seen nothing and feel nothing, not even acknowledging the auditioner's presence. An accute lack of self-worth sets in immediately. (3) This is perhaps the most insidious of torture techniques. They will praise without reserve the auditioner's performance and generally lead the auditioner to believe that they are ecstatic and blessed to have been present at such a wonderful event. After the tortue session, the torturers will promptly never call their victim again. In this case, initial euphoria is slowly replaced by an accute lack of self-worth.
A fourth, less common, but equally insidious technique is often referred to, in hushed tones, as "The Callback." A callback occurs when, against all odds, and over all obstacles, (such as typing for age, race, gender, hair color, height, accent, economic class, and personality, as actual ability is never a factor), the torturers take a special interest in their subjects. A callback gets the auditioner/victim one step closer to the coveted "part," and thus is, ironically regarded with enthusiasm. Callbacks occur either the same day or up to several long weeks after the initial session. There are various theories about how to handle a callback. Delusionals of all sorts will purport that the proper technique is to "do the same thing you did in the audition, because that's what they (the torturers) liked," while others will insist that it is preferable to "show them something different." Depending on the level of cruelty of the powers that be, the number of callbacks one may need to go to can be almost limitless. Five, six, seven, ten: whatever it takes to break the hapless actor.
Whichever technique is used, the end result is invariably the same. Plodding down the streets of our cities and towns is a broken, gray, scorned, and dispirited class of people, needlessly cut down before their time by near constant humiliation, criticism, and exhaustion.
Support groups (workshops and classes) for survivors exist, counseling victims to 'be themselves,' 'have fun with it,' 'think of it as a chance to perform,' and 'remember that they're (the torturers) people too.' There is, however, much dispute about the efficacy of the these self-defense techniques and it is generally agreed that the only solution is to stop the inhumane acts entirely. Sadly, as is common in cases of abuse, the victims will often defend their abusers and even their torture, willingly and often eagerly welcome their fate.
Human rights activists have been focusing their attention of late on the cities of New York, Los Angeles, and London as hot spots of abuse, though even a cursory check of any town would turn up abuses.
