h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OK, so ride report as promised. Apologies for its length but I cut and pasted from somewhere else so it's not like I typed it more than once


Well this was my first 600 and what an experience! Phew that was HOT

Ride Route - Leighton Buzzard - Pangbourne - Chandler's Ford - Salisbury - Sherbourne - Exeter - Wells - Cirencester - Brackley - Leighton Buzzard.

Stared 7.00 am Saturday 14th - time limit 11.00 pm at finish on Sunday (pace must be between 15 kph and 30 kph)


Flew off at the start, often riding at the head of the peloton as we made very good speed to Panbourne. My handlebar bag demonstrated some issues here as I lost various belongings from it on the road. If it hadn't been for that I would probably have arrived at Pangbourne ahead of pace as we were getting it up to 18.1 mph when I lost the first item from the barbag and had to stop and recatch the peloton for the first time.
Controlled at the co-op in Pangbourne and headed off with a now smaller group consisting of Bikey Mikey, Aidan and iCycle (yacf monikers). This dwindled to three as iCycle went his own pace but he was to be still seen at times for most of the day - saw him again at Sherbourne for example.

At Chandler's Ford I lost Mikey and Aidan as I followed my GPS while they clearly stopped for food. So I had a club sandwich and an ice cold lager at a Harvester for my lunch. Then headed for Salisbury on my own. The heat started to really get up now and in Salisbury I sat at a lake by the cathedral and dunked various parts of my body in the water as I listened to charming teenagers discuss OD-ing and cameltoes (yeah, they were lovely )
After controlling here and going well so far off ot Sherbourne I went on my own. On the way to here the heat and the fast beginning started to take its toll and the choppiness of the terrain drained my soul. I linked up with iCycle and Aidan again into Sherbourne but we split here as I needed proper fuel and they wanted to go to yet another garage. So I stopped at The Crown a newly opened pub it seemed. I was aware there was some heavy climbing to come soon and I was well knackered already. So my thoughts were to get some major calories down my neck. A problem that was going to get worse started here though as my body started to reject food. I'd suffered this issue at the final control on the national 400 before though and that stuffed me - so I forced a lovely bowl of soup and a chocolated fudge cake down my neck. Interestingly my body had no such problem with liquids as I inhaled a pint of lager as I waited for my food (it seems I was thirsty ) so this was followed by two more pints - this time of Orang Juice and lemonade.
Controlling here was an issue though The pub had only just opened so the receipt was just a small piece of paper with some numbers on it - no address, no time. So I got the guy at the bar to sign and date both the Brevet card and the receipt. I hope this is OK, I've also 'checked in' there on Facebook and have a GPS tracklog to back up my timings... I 'checked in' on Facebook at most controls just to let my various FB friends my progress - it never occurred to me that it might come in handy later on!

So with boat loads of calories from Sherbourne the real climbing started. I met up with Steve on my way out of Sherbourne and we stayed together until Chard - well ish. I could see him in the distance still; until I stopped at Tesco in Chard for some sustenance. Anyway, I had suspected, as with other long audaxes that I might start walking hills and this seemed a likely time - but lo! fuel at Sherbourne did the business. I didn't walk up a single hill all day on Saturday and made all the big climbs either side of Chard. I will admit to stopping for a rest up the final one halfway up - but I mitigated this by heading up to the top and then realising I'd left my glasses behind where I'd stopped so I had return to fetch them and so did this hill 1 1/2 times! I arrived in Exeter at about midnight and had a Subway special. I got quizzed here by another customer who, as it turned out, was a cyclist too and was wondering what I was doing out so late. He gave me lots of encouragement when I told him

So last leg of the night and more calorie intake saw me fly into the Travelodge in Sampford Peverell - I got a real second wind here and steamrollered past a couple of guys about 5 miles before the stop.
Took three hours sleep and the rest stop putting me right up against the time limit in the morning. Had I realised what issues I was going to get later on I migth have given myself half an hour less but I don't regret the sleep it was lovely and just what I needed.

Day2
Woke up, had a crap shower (Travelodge - would a small bar of soap really be too much to ask?) and headed out in chamois cream covered fresh bibshorts and top. Yes I'm finally coming to appreciate el-lubrication and the rigours of all day in the saddle re posterior issues.
Legs were tired but I was delighted to see that the next leg was very benign with only 362 ft of climbing! I wondered if that in fact meant elevation difference and it turns out, yes, that is exactly what the Garmin meant So in fact I rolled into Wells having done rather more climbing than I'd hoped. It was *really* heating up by the time I got to Wells.
My body was still rejecting solids so controls from now on meant 1L milk, 1L of orange juice and loads of water. I did manage half a flapjack in Wells though.

Now the toughest of all tough legs began. Searing heat and some good proper west country choppiness preceded the mother of all climbs out of Bath. I'd stopped in Bath and had a rather nice peach with another guy called Steve, pretty much the last fellow rider I would see on the ride. This stop rather put me back right up against the time limit though although Steve was pleased that we had 4 hours to make the 60 km to Cirencester I was not so confident. I descended into Bath and then got lost as the Garmin tried to send me up duel carriage way style roads the wrong way. This was more or less after the climbs turned into 25% or whaterver those slopes are in Bath. I ended up having to actually carry my bike about at one point as I certainly wasnt' getting on on those slopes and wheeling the bike on cleats as those slopes were dangerous at times. So I used my phone maps to get me out of trouble and headed for Bannerdown. I'm not sure I could do that climb in benign conditions - I certainly wasn't beginning to attempt it in that heat. The air was dead and walking up to Bannerdown was little short of a nightmare in searing temperatures with very little shelter. This was my lowpoint. I was now walking and having been lost, significantly behind the time limit. My crumb of comfort was that i knew this was the last of the big climbs on the ride.
So when I got to the top I tried to make up the time to at least get to Cirencester by the cut off. A little joyful moment came 18 miles prior to Cirencester where I stopped briefly in the shade to check on the time with the Brevet card and was delighted to see that I'd 2 hours to make 18 miles. Easy. The moment I headed off - puncture! Snarl. Still, got it fixed and lost about 20 minutes. In the end I did actually manage it but only just and through controlling at Waitrose before I got ino Cirencester proper.
The rest of the ride was hopefully going to be easier now and I thought I could make the time up.

I could but it was tough. I was proper dehydrated now and I finally worked out why I could eat no solids. My body was incapable currently of producing a saliva. This discovery allowed me to eat again at the expense of time and I had a celebratory banana and energy bar plus my usual orange juice/milk/coke combination at the last control at Brackley.
I made the last two control points with half an hour in hand each time and rolled into Leighton Buzzard at 10.30 pm.

Here the receipt is again an issue but again I have GPS and facebook 'check in' to help me plus a signed handmade receipt and Brevet card from the Barmaid.

So... less than a year after discovering I liked to cycle a long way and 13 months since I began my post-student cycling efforts I have completed an SR (subject to validation).

(SR - Super Randonneur - rides of 200 km, 300 km, 400 km and 600 km in one season)

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bike related woes. Cable stretch means I've lost use of the front derailleur (for about the last 2/3 of the 600k) and I lost my lowest gear *before* Chard (GROAN)
It needs a new headset (kind of knew that already) and I suspect I've worn the chain and rear cassette althOugh the skipping I got towards the end might just be an indexing issue related to the cable stretch.
I need a new set of cleats after Bannerdown hill.

Issues with myself.
I have a very sore arse! I'm starting to agree that a racing saddle is not best suited to one of these things.
I've got numb heels on my hands and a numb right foot and more aches and pains elsewhere than I care to mention.
I broke my glasses on the way into Brackley. I lost a lense on the road and it won't go back in.


What _ an _ adventure! Congrats to all who made it and once again it was nice to ride with Mikey, Steve, Aidan, Ian and Steve. (we should just make things easier and just call everyone who rides an audax Steve )