h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I used to love it when they stained the fences!!

Hmmm...thats a problem when you sit on it afterward though...

..You dont sit on fences...

I like the smell of petrol

And my GCSE Chemistry teacher was always ranting about how the syllabus said we had to be able to describe the smell of ammonia (ammonium? see how quickly it slips away!) as being "like smelling salts" - which was silly because it's what smelling salts are made of, so of course that's what it smells of...

Anyway, I'll stop ranting by proxy now

*Giggles*

Van de Merwe: "I used to be a racing driver once... I loved the smell of the exhaust fumes, I loved the sight of the wispy trails of exhaust smoke from the car in front of me, I loved the sound of the cars exhausts..."

Stoffel: "Yeah? Then why'd you give it up?"

Van de Merwe: "I was suffering from exhaustion!"

That's so bad.

Well, it's aso bad, it's funny in a weird twisted way.

It's a South African thing...
You know all those dumb blonde jokes?
We get our fair share of them here too, but we don't use dumb blondes. We use this guy called Van de Merwe who is a typical South African Afrikaaner. Stoffel is his friend, so if a joke requires 2 people, Stiffel is the other guy in it.
These two don't really exist, by the way...

Other jokes we have when they involve three people always start: "An Englishman, an Irishman and Van de Merwe..."

We have the ones with Paddy Englishman, Paddy Irishman and Paddy Scotsman. And the Irish one's the dummy.

Hmmm....why do we always have the jokes on our own countrymen?
I guess though, it is more polite.

I agree..

Though there is a lot of the mad/dumb Irishmen stuff. So many jokes about it. Never heard any jokes like that about other nationalities.

What's Ireland famous for anyway?