h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

She has a page in H2G2. She loves me. I feel like a teenager, ten years down the line. To that woman, I would like to say a few things.

Pilsbury cinammon rolls, Wednesdays, Empire State, letters with a Queen's head stamp on them, tapes and Pooh Bear.

She knows who she is.

(smile)

Awwwwwww...how sweet

Pilsbury Cinammon rolls...? Yes, they ARE sweet. Mmmmmmmm... Oh, wait, maybe that's not what you meant. Haha.

Azza is just jealous because all he gets is relentless, heavy sex. And his girlfriend is really called Lola. Only joking... I bet she looks like a ...like a ...like a really nice female impersonator.

HEY-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y !!! Hahahahahaha.

Be nice, Shawn, or Azza will start saying rude things about me, and we wouldn't want that, would we? I'm sure Lorna is lovely. So shush.

Yes dear. Of course dear.

You're learning. Repeat after me: "Beth is always right. Beth is always right." Hahaha

Beth kicks me out of bed at 7am, Beth kicks me out of bed at 7am, Beth kicks me out of bed at 7am... heh heh heh.

Sorry...? Not that...? Oooops.

http://www.cat-scan.com and mieow...

Isee your getting him well trained already Beth...

Shawn...Sit, Bark, Rollover...

I am having a tough time getting him house-trained, though. Men: they can be tamed, but they can never be fully domesticated. Ask him about "fish-head."

Things that go through people's mind when they see this...

Azza- FishHead... Shawn's codeword on on-line games. He's showing his own space.

Beth (billyp)- FishHead... nmemonic device, used to remind Shawn to PUT TOILET SEAT DOWN.

Oh dear. Yours sincerely,

But men can't put the toilet seat down, It's in our D.N.A., we could grow breasts easier than remember to put the bog seat down.

And is that why your goldfish never live long Shawn, cos that "fish head" sounds more like an order....Fish HEAD-NOW!!!!

Azza, if you can grow breasts, that is one trick I would pay to see.

Me too. Maybe I would have faced you when the drugs had taken hold. Rrrrawl, hubba hubba, clik-clik.

Good evening, and for today's top story: (sounds of "I'm every woman" playing in the background....) A man in the north of England has turned the cosmetic surgery industry on its head by revealing that he can grow breasts out of sheer will alone. The makers of silicon breast implants are selling off shares of their stocks at cut rate, hoping to dump them while they still hold any value. According to the man's girlfriend, this young man can and does grow breasts whenever the mood strikes. He has yet, however, to figure out how to put down a toilet seat lid.

And now, the weather......


Haha. Right, and with that, I am off to stuff myself silly with turkey. Peace and love...

I'm From the North, not in it.

...and just because I have pert man breasts... (this sentence has been severly censored)

...erm, Happy Easter or whatever it is, thingy, giving day whatsit.

xxxxxx

I see Azza has chosen to ignore this whole line of conversation. Smart man.

Sho-o-o-orty... where a-a-a-are you-u-u-u-u-...?

I am here, I've been living in the real world for a few days. My I must say I didn't think you would get so much mileage out of such a silly statement...now if you'll excuse I'm going to play with my new breasts (If you get my meaning nudge nudge wink wink)