h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Sitting, waiting, wondering, sadness.
Waiting for a word from him telling me its ok.
Wondering why he doesnt care.
Wondering why I do.
Sadness for his careless way.
Sadness for how much it hurts.
Back to wonder, how did I fall?
Why did he not at all?
Doesnt he know how special I am?
I know how special he is...or was?
How can he be so cold?
Why isnt he contacting me?
Why do I ask such silly questions?
I know its best that hes not in touch.
I know hes harmful to my soul.
But when things were good between us, I was on top of the world.
Now I feel so low.
When will I be ok?
When will I not care?
Sitting, waiting, wondering, sadness.
Another night...alone.

Hi,
as I read your poem it reminded me so much of a younger me. I even used to write poetry like yours. I have been watching your "feeling foolish" conversation and didn't reply as everyone was already saying exactly what I was thinking.

You don't sound happy but if you really are like me the poetry is a way to get it out. Are you OK?

Purple Giraffe

Hey...thanks for saying hi.
It wasnt intended as poetry...its how I felt "right then".
I am not happy...at night when the house is quiet and the day is coming to an end.
The daytime hours are good though, when I am busy.
If you only knew the things he said to me, and the way he said them.
I cant believe he doesnt care, and I cant believe how much I do care.
It really sucks.
I thought he liked me.
I thought I was in control of how I felt.
I thought it was no big deal.
I cant believe how bad it hurts to know I meant nothing!
I know ill be ok in time, I just hate waiting.
I just want to stop feeling so bad.
Thnaks so much for sharing, and saying hello.
That was nice of you.

Glad the days are good. That's a really good start. I assume it's night and quiet now. (I was just called away to a spider emergency which actually turned out to be sugar ants. 2 year olds have great imaginations!)
I know how much you are hurting, feel free to tell me more about him if you like. What was so special about him that you fell for him before you even met him? What were your common interests? Or you can run him down if that will feel better.

Giraffe (who can fix fairy flowers)

Hello again.
I think meeting him is what made me realize I had fallen.
Before we physically met, I wasnt so attached...I dont think I was anyway.
He was so beautiful.
Physically, he was everything I wanted and more.
He had/has the sexiest voice, with a slight southern-ness to it.
I am a sucker for a southern accent.
He was so handsome.
He said things that were so sweet...cant believe I fell for BS.
When we met (in person) he said he thought he didnt need a girl, then I came along and turned his world upside down.
Whatever buddy...heres a couple more spins for ya...hows that...you feeling nauseas yet huh?
uh...er...sorry about that.
Im angry right now.
I have issues with trust, and I began trusting him, now I see I should have kept on being an ice queen and not given him a bit of my trust, emotion, and concern.
They say hind sights 20/20...
I feel Ill never find the one for me.
I thought he could have been it.

Thanks Amy...where have you been?
How are you doing?

The modem on my home machine still isn't working, so I can only post from w*rk... And that also means no IM until the modem works again. But I've been on here. And I'm doing fine

Although you don't say much about him I think I can relate. I once met someone who looked like a miniature of one of our Olympic divers. Absolutely gorgeous. I fell immediately. Wasn't that bad news! I've made plenty of other mistakes too. Men can be so bad for the self-esteem. One man I went out made me feel fat when I was actually underweight. He kept pointing out beautiful women and saying they were fat. He even accused Nicole Kidman of having a fat bum.
So I can understand how you feel about giving up on men. It can be a good thing. I gave up on ever finding the right man for me. I was about 32 and nearly every relationship I had been in had ended in disaster. They had all turned from attentive, sweet, loving guys into men who only cared about how things affected them. Then I gave up. My friends came to my rescue. One of my friends set me up with her ex and he is so special. He is so considerate and caring. He gets very upset whenever he does something to upset me - and that's usually me just over reacting. I think I went through all the crap so I would appreciate him as much as he deserves.
So we have to help you find your self confidence so you will be ready when the right man finally shows up. And he will because you deserve him.