h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

An often tan and sticky substance, caramel is named after the process in which heated sugar blackens slightly, as the carbon within it starts to break away from its molecular bonds. This process is called carmelization, and may be witnessed if you sautee onions in a frying pan until they've browned. Carmelization refers to this slight blackening process in any carbon-based plant sugar, but this term is most often used to refer to the carmelization of the sugars derived from the sugar cane plant.

Caramel is often sold in cellophane wrappers, but can also be found in or on various commercial (and fine) candies and chocolates made throughout the world.

Caramel is available in several textures:

--> Some are very soft, frequently this is the case in manufactured chocolate and
caramel bars available near the register at your local grocery store.
--> As is common among the packaged sweets industry, however, it may be
semi-soft. This sort of caramel is popular at Halloween in the United States, as
it is easy to chew, and does not usually stick to your teeth for more than a
second or two. This is also the sort of caramel that is usually melted-down
in many recipes, not the least known of which is the Caramel Apple.
--> Sometimes, caramel may have a harder, almost taffy-like but not as sticky,
texture; this seems to be most common among fancier boxed chocolates.

Recently, some companies have taken to coating Green-Apple-flavored lollipops with caramel and calling it a caramel-apple-pop. The presence of other sucrose-type sugars, besides those already in the caramel, and in addition to the saliva in your mouth, can turn this treat into a harrying experience. If you should happen to take leave of your senses, chancing to bite this confection at any time, you should expect your top teeth to fuse immediately to your bottom teeth; expect to remain this way for at least another five to ten minutes. Separating your teeth before your saliva dissoves a sufficient amount of the sugars is painful and is not generally recommended.

Just as there are warnings on everything these days, from cups of fresh-made coffee to packages containing scissors, there are warnings to heed about caramel as well. It is a known fact that the breakdown of certain types of carbon molecules may be carcinogenic. (Remember that study a few years ago about using charcoal for barbecuing?) This basically means that caramel has been shown to cause cancer in laboratory animals if ingested in larger quantities.

What I want to know is why are they feeding my caramel to lab rats, and where can I get a job like that?