h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Leo

I've subbed the entry and it can be found at A14138147. You know, check it out, see if I've done an acceptable job, all that good stuff.

I realized that it flip-flops back from first to third person a lot. Mostly it's ok, except here:

>>Once a swimmer has mastered the undulation, throw in the kick.

I think it should be, "Once you have mastered the undulation, throw in the kick."

Also, I just realized that I described the arm motion, but not when it goes. Can you chuck in somewhere that the arms enter the water the same time as the head?

Also, the first footnote:

can you change: ""That distinction goes to the freestyle, or front crawl.""

to "That distinction goes to the freestyle, also known as the front crawl." And then, there's one paragraph where it uses both freestyle and front crawl within two sentences of each other. I guess it would be smarter to just use one name, and I think freestyle is the general term.

Otherwise, looks great. Thanks.

I've fixed the second-person thing, added the bit about the arms and changed the footnote. I made the freestyle/front crawl thing consistent, but I changed all the references to "front crawl", because my understanding is that's the more common British English term. I hope that meets with your approval.

Excellent!

Will bring you our business in the future.

My brother used to be very good at the butterfly stroke.
Are you a swimmer, Echo?

Not a very adept one. I could probably not drown if I felt out of a boat, but that's about it.