h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

here.



I've seen another strange person in the supermarket today.

I was paying for a sandwedge (A blummink nice sandwedge) when I heard singing a little way behind me. I turned around to see a man wearing cycling gear, singing a show tune and tap dancing in the aisle.

I turned back around to face my Till-Man.

Wondered if that had really happened.

Turned back around and saw that he was still there, tap dancing away.

Remembering that I had asked Hootoo about why someone would buy 103 baguettes, after my baguette man episode, I was in mid-thought about asking Hootoo: "What would cause you to sing and tap dance at the till of Marks & Spencers?". But my Till-Man answered my thought before I could even begin thinking of silly answers: "He's a chuffin' loony."

I can't wait to go to the supermarket again

Oh, and Mr Postman didn't deliver my jacket while I was out It's still in Rotherham depot.

I was *almost* in Rotherham today, I could have gone and collected it

This jacket episode is the worst that my laziness has been so far. I only ordered it online because I couldn't be bothered to walk up a *slightly* steep hill and get it in the shop.

Oh! Bought my lovely jeans today too

a singing tapdancing cyclist! now, imagine him, singing and dancing his way out the shop with 103 baguettes that he then carries on his bike! I'm still waiting for my new PC case to arrive no lazyness mind; the only place this particular one was availible was online

I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that Sheffield is the insanity capital of the UK.

The cycling tap dancer *could* be the same cyclist who rides all around town shouting at the top of his voice, all day long.

That's quite a skill he's got then, cycling, tapdancing and town criering all at the same time. If he learns something else he may forget how to breathe or something.

He's not very good at missing things. Nearly knocked me over a couple of times

God knows how though, I should have heard him coming

Oh yeah, I probably had Maurice plugged in.

Stealth kamikaze town crier unicycle tapdancing? Is there no end to to his talents?

Quick! hire him! we'l set up a travelling display, traveling round the country we'l make millions! we'l be able to have 103 baguettes whenever we want!

We can attach a basket to the front of his bicycle, he can carry the 103 baguettes door to door

we've currently gota couple of nutcases outside in the street sounds as if some kids are trying to batter a car to death with a supermaket trolley, and theres either a drunk or a nutcase or both just kinda shouting random obsenities not sur eif he's shouting them at anyone in paticular oooo I hear big boots on a staircase; that will be the German boys next door heading out to the clubs Now all i kneed is the skin head bloke nutcase next door to do a bit of random drilling, and then he can rush out on to the street dragging his whife with him and start yelling at each other just an average saturday night I should move....

"I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that Sheffield is the insanity capital of the UK"

Nope, I think that's where 2legs lives.

I always thought that was Lala land

lala land; where 2legs lives! its a loverly road relaly during the day just tends to end up a direct route home at night for all the drunken teenagers and we've a nutcase skinhead next door the German guys the other side are alright; just they forget to take their boots off sometimes when they get home at 2 AM from the clubs and they can make a bit of noise trailing up the stairs and we sometimes get a few comfussed nice young forign girls knowcking on our door thinking this is their place as yet, all my attempts to intice the young girls in have failed

Actually, I think it's Oompa Loompa Island.

///Trin: Don't read this///

They're all nuts on there. Kids set fire to ships, lottery winners find out their numbers are cursed, conmen unexpectedly meet other islanders old folks.

\\\Trin: Don't read this\\\

Oh no, its the badger collector at the door, I gotta pay my latest installment on the badger

No it isn't, it's just your friendly neighbourhood tax man.

You have to pay tax on ?

Don;t have to pay tax on vodka, do I?