Journal Entries

Dr and Mrs Funderlik decide to come back

Well, that was a long holday... arf arf. But there's loads more stuff outside than we thought. Not just cheese and dogs, but medicines, pillows and cuddly toys and lots of other things. It took ages just to eat it all.

We'll we're back inside now, and we won't be going outside again. In fact, Dr. Funderlik has metamorphosised. And that's not something he does every day. What he's done is gone and made his own personal web log site ( a 'blog' - horrible word). So, if you wander in this general direction:
http://www.seahorse-design.com/neutrino.php
.. you'll find the same variety of freewheelin' antidisestablishment nonesense that he used to do here.

But, now, see, its mine ... all mine... and the bbc can go and sit on a barrage balloon.

If you are mad enough to actually go and see, you'll find out more about the real me - the real deckchair behind the funderlik so to speak. It is not possible yet to comment on the site, but you can email me from it, and I update pretty regularly. Hope to see you around there. And if you enjoy the experience, or if you even survive it, please pass it on.

And... before anyone asks - no, I won't be back around here very much. I got addicted last time, and my work suffered. So - I have had to quit. Apologies, but it was too much fun. smiley - smiley

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Latest reply: Jan 7, 2004

Dr and Mrs Funderlik decide to run away.

As part of a convoluted tax dodge, myself and Mrs Funderlik have decided to try our luck by running away. Officially, this is called a 'Holiday'. We saw this interesting and strange looking place on television, and realised that we could probably go there quite reasonably and cheaply. The place is called "outside", and apparently theres all sorts of stuff to see there - the sun, trees, dogs, apples and stuff like that. So we're going there for a month.

Dr Funderlik believes and Mrs Funderlik agrees, that after about five minutes and thirty two seconds of being "outside", Dr Funderlik will start shouting "Where's my computer?" and whimpering like a baby. So it is very possible that we might get back on-line over the next four weeks or so. But if Dr. Funderlik can be distracted with rattles, soothers and large balloons, then the silence may be somewhat more prolonged.

We step out of the thing called a "door" on Friday. After that - who knows? Hopefully be back soon, and if not, please don't buy any emergency batteries or extra frozen chicken, for we shall return near the end of August.

Discuss this Journal entry [22]

Latest reply: Jul 16, 2003

The Invention of Television.

Dougal?

Aye John?

Have ye got a minute?

Aye.

Come here, I wanna show you something.

Aye....

... Ok, I'm here.

Oh, indeed, so you are. Now. Look at that.

That box?

Aye. That's me new invention.

What is it? Is it a porridge making device of some kind?

Sadly not, Dougal, sadly not.

Well, John, that's where I must take my leave of ye then. You know my motto: If it doesnee concern porridge, then I'm no interested. I liked that thing you invented last week, that pipe for transferring porridge from the bathroom to the kitchen. I reckon that has potential, that one. But this box here, well, I cannae see the point of it, to be honest. Unless.....

Yes, Dougal?

...is it full of porridge?

No. I'll tell ye what it does. You see this switch here? I'm going to make it so that when you turn that switch, this front part of the box, it gets all full of colours and lights...

Aye, John, well, its getting late..

No, wait Dougal, there's sound too - and the pictures move and you see, this is the great bit, people - I am positive of this, absolutely positive - people will want, more than anything, to sit in front of this box and watch stuff move, er, inside it.

You've been working very hard of late, is that not so, John? You think anyone's going to be stupid enough to sit in front of that wee box and watch stuff moving inside it? Why would they want to do that, eh? I mean, there's stuff moving everywhere. I donna want to dissapoint ye John, but, if you look very carefully, there's even stuff moving ... just outside that wee box there.

But its educational too, Dougal. It can teach you things.

Ay, John, we've got books for that...

But...

Ay, I know, stuff doesn't move inside books. I'm afraid I really must go. I mean, think about it, John, there's a huge big world out there. If ye think that millions and millions of people are going to sit for hours on end, staring at stuff moving inside this wee little box, then you must think that human nature is a bizzare and, dare I say it, perverse thing. I'll take me leave of ye now John. Do drop by next week, and tell me about the developments ye make on the device for transporting porridge. Good day to ye now.

Good day, Dougle...

*thinks*

...maybe if I made the box a wee bit bigger..

Discuss this Journal entry [18]

Latest reply: Jul 13, 2003

The Rubik of Victor Kiam

The Rubik of Victor Kiam.

"A bottle of wine, and I and thou, singing in the wilderness...

and its my wilderness, so there."

"My name is Victor Kiam.

My mission: a world without beards."

Copyright Victor Kiam.
I liked this Rubik so much, I bought it, and then I added that bit about beards.

You know, how I used to say, 'I liked the razor so much, I bought the company' ?

Well, that was b*******ks. I mean, if I did that with everything I liked, I'd own McDonalds, Panasonic, Playboy and Acapulco by now. But I think I'll buy this Dr Funderlik chap, and have him shaved. He's a hairy menace, that's what he is, and he should be removed from society.

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Latest reply: Jul 3, 2003

The Rubik of Victor Kiam.

The Rubrick of Victor Kiam:

Discuss this Journal entry [2]

Latest reply: Jul 3, 2003


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Dr Deckchair Funderlik

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