Journal Entries
No Time!!!!
Posted Jul 31, 2004
Very busy, gotta be quick.
*deep breath*
Radio show is back up and running, 87.7fm this time round. listen through the web at http://www.orbitfm.co.uk ands phone in, email send carrier pigeon
And I'll reply, honest
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Latest reply: Jul 31, 2004
Oh Lucky Me!!
Posted Jul 10, 2004
Well, I suppose I owe the five or six of you that read this journal an explanation as to where I have been the last few weeks
On Wednesday the 16th of June I flew out to Portugal to join the hordes of England Football fans already out there
When we arrived at a little before 11 in the morning it was already 28 degrees celcius
. Those that have met me will know that my Polish/Irish skin and blood doesn't react well to such intense sunshine
Luckily for me the hotel, Residencial Astoria , had air-conditioning
. Unfortunately, you can't take it out with you The highest I saw the temperature reach was 39 degrees And it rarely ventured below 25, even at night
.
We found a little place to drink called 'Docas', a purpose built row of bars and restaurants along the water front directly opposite that huge statue of the angel, or Jesus, I'm not sure, I never asked. It was whilst on my way back from here one night that the first piece of misfortune got hold of me. I left my phone in the taxi
It fell out of the ridiculously inadequate pockets of my three quarter length shorts
And seeing as everyone in Portugal is either a waiter or a Taxi driver, the chances of finding the same cab again were remote
So it was goodbye to my nice new phone
Time to mourn that loss would proove to be extremely short as the next night, at Docas, I was enjoying a nice drink in one of the Irish bars they have there. Surrounded by singing Englishman and having a cordial chat to an American chap who for some reason had the Merseyside Liver Bird and England's 3 Lions tattooed onto his belly
All in all I was having an enjoyable evening, up until something walloped me on the head just above the right eye
No time to get angry and see what it was because within seconds my face was covered in blood, I hate blood
One late night and 4 stitches later I'm back at the hotel, where my friend tells me it was a little Portuguese boy that had thrown an ashtray for no apparent reason. A big ceramic ashtray at that, and the police had swiftly, and undeniably, 'sorted him out'.
Again, not much time to dwell over my new scar as it soon becomes clear to me 2 days later that my bank doesn't have the money I thought was in it. Upon phoning the Telephone banking service ,and spending close to 20 euros in doing so, I am told my card has been used on days that I know it wasn't. My card had been cloned and nearly £300 has been stolen.
I actually found this quite funny in the end. I started to think to myself, 'Typical really, I can't believe I even thought I might actually have a nice time with no hiccups! I certainly don't have any past experiences to have pulled such a fantastical expectation from, so screw them all and feed 'em rice as they say, and keep smiling you damn fool
'.
If you want to make God laugh, have a plan, springs to mind
The rest of the holiday passed by with me scrimping along with the money I had left.
I did however meet Mr and Mrs Wayne Rooney. They came and sat with us at this nice cafe we found. We actually met up there on 3 occassions, they are very nice people, and his mum loves a sing song
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Latest reply: Jul 10, 2004
A Story that I plucked from the ever increasing Inspiration Fields of Earth
Posted Jun 3, 2004
If I was to write a story, it would be full of explosions and space battles. If I were to write a play, it would be full of murder and intrigue. If I were to write a poem, it would be full of wisdom and hidden meaning. So the what the hell is this that I wrote?
The ********** King stood on top of the granite ridge that marked the border into *****. The wind was blowing so hard in the valley below as to cause a howling, yet he appeared untouched by it's icy flow. Below him the battlefield stretched for miles. Plumes of smoke from the burning huts and stockades danced a merry dance as they were swept away by the bitter wind.
"They enemy has retreated beyond the hills sire!" Exclaimed a smaller ********** who had scurried up next to the king. He was smaller and had only four legs compared to the King's eight on his wasp like abdomen. His human body was starting to bend back on itself with te force of the wind. And even with four arms he was having trouble keeping his red clak from flapping wildly away with the gusts that raged up the side of the ridge.
Yet the King stood tall and firm. The wind seeming not to want to bother him. His cloak, draped over his shoulders and tied at the neck, hung eerily still.
"No need to shout General." His voice was calm.
"It's the wind sir! Do you think we really needed this much!?" Screamed the General.
"What wind?" Came the soft reply. This always worried the General. He knew the King was being sincere and honestly didn't know there was any wind! Which made the General wonde exacly what the wind would be like if the king acknowledged it was actually there?
"Nevermind sir, sorry." He was doing his best to talk normal now, but this just made him sound like a fish out of water as the wind would force the vibrating air molecules back into his mouth. The King nodded his answer anycase having heard exactly what the General just said. Answers on a postcard please. I left out names of creatures and places I had made up as I dislike the BBC's policy on having them printed on here. Anyway, it appears to be unfinished by a long shot but is very different to anything I have scribbled down in the past
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Latest reply: Jun 3, 2004
I'm off to the pub...
Posted May 15, 2004
...smoke me a kipper Captain, I'll be back in time for breakfast
Discuss this Journal entry [38]
Latest reply: May 15, 2004
I wish to complain...
Posted May 1, 2004
It is far too quiet on H2G2 between 2am and now, which is 5.30am
The only stimulating medium available to me to keep me awake is Countdown
And you wonder why I am sometimes a little disturbed
Discuss this Journal entry [36]
Latest reply: May 1, 2004
creachy
Researcher U211544
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