h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hazel,

I am intrigued by the idea of 'planning' in the context of decorating: isn't it just a case of buying some cheapo paint at the market and splashing it on the wall?

I wouldn't dream of boring everyone rigid with my mishaps on the cri**et field but here is a little anecdote:

Once, I was bowling leg breaks and I had just started my 24th over...

Ali,
careful planning is absolutley essential before decorating. Otherwise you might actually have to start doing it!

Bowling a "leg break"? I thought you used little balls?

Legers,

Good evening to you.

The best in apocalyptic doom metal. Mr Hetfield and his colleagues have proved to be highly influential in their field; arguably as influential as Mr Cobain and his jovial friends in Nirvana.

Well, there is no need to be personal about it!

Some people think that the balls are quite big; compared to table tennis balls, they are.





Okay, so which colour scheme have you gone for?

I only meant small as compared to Footballs!

The place I am (planning on) decorating is the hallway - I want a lot of rich Indian colours.

Rich Indian colours? I'm a filisteen...wassat then?

I painted a kitchen once. It was the most shocking piece of handiwork I have ever attempted.

You are not a filly-wotsit. I was thinking about the sort of colours you get in Indian hangings - gold, reds, bronzes and so on. At the moment mostly it is a (very dirty) cream and looks yuk - some of the woodwork is stained a nasty shade of dull brown which will need to be covered with a darker shade as it's not worth the effort to remove it.

Shall I wake you up now?

Ali, after careful thinking, I came to a conclusion that one of the best was Queen with Freddy Mercury. Unforunately that man decided to go to better place before I was able to go to his concert.

Designing is one of THE most boring things ever. In that art I rather do whatever someone tells me to do.

No carry on, Hazel. Will you go as far as adding Indian ornaments? Or is that too Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen?

Can you buy dirty cream paint in shops? Do you reckon you can still buy that icky wallpaper you see in a 'particular' sort of B&B?

Legers - excellent! Come round here NOW and paint my hallway. After all - I've done all the hard work!

Legers,

Were Queen a metal band? If they were, then so were Led Zepp, The Who et al.

If I am feeling really bleak, then a little Joy Division, Cure or, strangely, Beth Orton seem to hop out of the CD pile.

Ali - I already have some hangings for the walls ( that's the easy part) - but ornaments just get dusty. LLB is a d***head! So - what was so dreadful about the kitchen?

The colour was vile, it was really patchy and streaky, I smeared paint all over the doors, frames, dog etc, and I managed to ruin my watch.

Apart from that it was lovely!

Interior design is a subject I am happy to admit I know nothing about. I am quite good at destroying things (weeds etc.).

Will the rest of the house have a similar theme?

Not really Ali. Queen same as Led Zepplin was a rock bands. I think that they are the "parents" of today's rock. Sorry for changing the conversation so quick from Metal to Rock

Wysiwyger, no problem. My servies are approximately 7 euro an hour Now, where is that brush

*services

Umm - naturally I have no notion of what you mean by a "particular sort" of B&B. I have stayed in a wonderfully tacky type of motel a few times though!

Legers - 7euros sounds good value (although I would prefer to pay by results .

Ali - the rest of the house is in various stages of disarray - the bits I have managed to do so far is nore of a holding operation - i.e. paint over the grunge! But eventually I would like a real mixture of styles..... painting animals is probably never a good idea - they say you should put butter on a new cat to make it stay around. I only tried that once - a long time ago - the smell was horrible!

Puttin butter on a cat? That a good one My sister tryed to blow dry one. Couldn't get it out from under the closet for a day and a half.

Wysi, what if you try different cultural styles. Chinese room, American, Italian, France, etc...

Now now Legers. What would I put in an American room? Posters of Dubya? The Flag

The flag is an ok idea. But I would rather put stuf that truly American. Paint on some hotdogs on the wall. Than, if its a bedroom, make a bed out of the old Ford Trucks bed (they have these Fords every where)
Thats the stuff I'm talking about.
And don't forget the picture of hundred dollar bill all across the ceiling