This is the Message Centre for paulie
? Posted Feb 21, 2003
Don't tell me you've such a short attention span and you switched channels for good and all. Dang!! And here you told me you were chatty and all. What is it, things going heavy for you in real life. I hope you staying away from those cancer sticks. I know you are. You can do it!!
paulie Posted Feb 24, 2003
no, not lost interest, just very busy, and distracted. I actually haven't felt that well lately, I think the sinus thing never really cleared up. I am going to research some organic medicines today, I just don't feel comfortable with dousing myself with chemicals all the time.
I still haven't smoked a cigarette. I am approaching my two month mark now and I'm proud of myself. But I decided one year would be my determining point, to know I have quit for sure. When the year has passed I am going to reward myself with a brand new laptop. One that I can dock and use as my pc and my laptop. I'm really looking forward to it. Plus I can give the two computers I have now to my daughter and my grandson. My daughter really doesn't need it but she wants one in her room. My grandson probably will not have one unless I give it to him. His parents don't seem to grasp the importance of being computer savvy in these days. They feel like him playing on the computer when he is at my house is enough exposure. Well of course they have them at his school too, but no where near enough for much time for each child.
I didn't get out and march yet I'm ashamed to say. Just couldn't seem to work it out that way. I am supposed to go to DC with some friend on March the 1st for a march though. If my family doesn't mutiny too badly on me about it. They are really against me going, but they're pretty much against me leaving the house most times. they'll get over it
? Posted Feb 24, 2003
I can't tell you how happy I was to see your post Paulie. Remember the arguments I sent you about the inadequacies of a web friendship? I guess the joke's on me; like it or not, I look everyday for today's fresh news from the people I post to. What a strange dependency this can become.
For this reason alone, I caution you about providing computers to your children.
The third consideration is the radiation from the crt monitors; I've read about the dangers in all kinds of publications including a multi-issue series in the "New Yorker." All over the EU they sell these monitors only if they are shielded with something called 'Mu' metal. Also the refresh really can strain the eyes and the brain. Get LCD monitors if you can.
All that said, I must admit that knowing how to use this relatively new tool has a value. It is still very primitive I think. It also has the danger of adding unnecessary complexity to simple tasks simply because it can compute those things. It does open many new possible avenues of discovery and learning and sharing.
I know you didn't ask but for whatever its worth, I offer this experience, if as nothing else, then as a further token of care.
As for your sinus problems, may I recommend a remedy that worked for all of my family and for me? In fact, I was the last to try it being thoroughly skeptical about the whole idea. If you can find a well-trained acupuncture doctor, I most sincerely say that you try a few sessions and any accompanying herbal medications. From my own humble experience and that of my family, I can assure you that this therapy works and does you no harm at all. Do try it.
Paulie I have a personal question; I ask because I think you may have examined some of my other threads. What ever is the matter with Analiese? Am I really the kind of monstrous being she would make me out to be from the gist of her posts? It saddens me that one as clever as she clearly is, can be so soaked in personal injury and hate that everything put before her is informed or suffused by it. I know this is dangerous to ask and I risk further injury; indeed, you may not wish to touch the question with a 10 ft. pole! What a tragic thing it is though, her pervasive way of thinking (admittedly there are sparkles of clarity that sometimes show themselves - even to one who is apparently as unseeing as I must seem to her!). Ah, well.
No worries about not getting out Paulie. Your heart is now, as I think it has always been, in a very good place. Even your good thoughts have value in that these lessen the negativity that seems to enshroud the world. Take care of yourself and be stay steadfast in your path to your goals. You're going to get there, where you need to go.
I hope now to take the same advice myself!
paulie Posted Feb 26, 2003
yes this stuff can be addictive, and you do become quite attached to people. but there are these cycles too, where you lose contact with people, sometimes for a very long time, then they show back up again. It's the nature of this thing I think. That doesn't make them any less a friend, just subject to the whims of this type relationship.
I got an email today from a young man in the Netherlands I met about five years ago, when I first found the internet myself. I was (am) into 3d computer modeling, as is he, and we both belonged to this community focused just on that. He is a wonderfully smart and funny boy, I suppose not nearly so young anymore. I think he did a search for my name and found my web page or something like that. It was quite a surprise to hear from him again.
I'll keep in mind what you say about the computer and your son. My daughter is not into it all that much, she prefers real life in the flesh little boys, another problem all together. But I think my grandson could tend in that direction. He's a very intense little boy anyway. Of course it will be up to his own parents to set the real guide lines for him, but I do have some input there. I am just afraid if I start warning them about stuff they might not want him to have the computer at all.
I'm afraid I will have to pass on the acupuncture. I'm a real open minded person, about everything but one thing, needles. The less I have come near my person in the remainder of my lifetime, the more I'm gonna like it. I know that's probably silly and counter-productive, but it's also not likely to change. I would just have to live with the sinus problem I guess.
I'm not sure why you think Analiese would make you out as a monster. I have read a lot of the other conversations, but nothing to explain that to me. It sounds like you are saying she will not listen to logic, or something like that. But you know logic is quite subjective. What may be to you may not be to her. What may be to me often is not to her, or to you. You just really have to not react so strongly to differences in opinion I guess. You have to remember she is a young woman with a very full life right in front of her face. Maybe she just doesn't have the extra time it would take to consider her views and express them in ways that you find easier to understand. So she says how she feels, and with feelings come misunderstandings. Then you gotta start explaining stuff, everything, and it gets old and drudgerly (is that a word?) and it's not something you do for fun anymore. You see what I am saying?
I think sometimes with this online stuff you have to be selective what you even react to. It's so hard to know how strongly the person you are talking to may feel about an issue, and how they might perceive something you might say. I think if you can't quite understand what somebody is trying to say, it might be best to to let that one slide on by. Change the subject, talk about something new, start fresh again. That doesn't work all that great in real life, but I think you can actually pull it off in this virtual environment. I do it all the time.
At any rate don't let it bother you too bad. I believe Analiese would actually like to get along with everybody. It can't be that easy to do in her situation though, I can understand how she would be vocal about her perspective.
? Posted Feb 26, 2003
Hey Paulie, thanks for bringing a smile to my lips and for helping me see things a little differently. It is good to do so, now and again. I do tend to be a 'Type A' personality in all aspects of my life and it can be a real strain.
What you say about Rusty/Analiese is quite so. I'm not sure I agree with you entirely about other things - like logic - but, let me hasten to add, that what you've said makes a great deal of sense.
One last plug for accupuncture and then I'll not mention it. The practitioner can give you a nice blindfold, put on nice music and lie you down on a nice comfy bed. You almost never feel the hair thin or thinner instruments. Not at all like injections, not a bit. Oh, there's also the use of electric stimulation in place of needles ... though it isn't as effective and there is cupping which also does not involve any puncture. You could always just try the herbs, in teas, in tinctures or in compressed tabs.
I'd already gathered you were into computer graphics from exploring your stuff since I first encountered you. What fun! My son is into Java script, Darwin (the Unix guts of Mac OSX), Linux etc. He's been okayed to do AP computer science next year. The kid lives a very high pressure life. I don't think I could.
paulie Posted Mar 2, 2003
sorry Kyaa, seems the delays are getting longer doesn't it. I guess life is just more hectic than even it is accustomed to these days. I've been making a concentrated effort to enage in more physical activity lately. Partly because when I am riding my bike or going for a walk or something, I hardly even think about wanting a cigarette. And naturally because it may help to offset all the food I've been cramming in my mouth for two months trying to kill this desire to smoke a cigarette. I tell you, if people think it is something that will go away in a month or so, they are mistaken. I tell everybody I run across who smokes, quit now, it will only get harder. Especially the young people who have only been smoking a few years.
I can't remember how my personality test came out, it was borderline something I do remember. I probabaly could have taken it the next day and it come out totally different. I do think my personality changes from one day to the next, I'm certain my mind does. I remember what job the test indicated I was best suited for, librarian, can you imagine. I was pretty dissillusioned with that at the time. Of course there were other more appealing suggestions, architect, artist, I can't remember what all. I should dig all that stuff out someday, see if I've changed much since then.
Your son sounds very smart, if he's into that programming stuff. I have tried to learn some of that myself, for web sites I have made, and it's too darn complicated for me. Of course the instructors are always barely passed their teens and they always discuss it in a way that makes it clear they find it simple and boring and anybody who doesn't get it must be incredibly daft. To be fair though, they generally lose their patience because I am hung up on understanding some little point and will not let the class advance. They would always say, you don't have to understand it, just remember it. I'm afraid that has never worked for me, and I wonder if it really did for them. I think young people are programmed themselve much differently than people my age. They grow up thinking writing computer programs is stuff high school students do. In my time it was some secret military personnel or something.
? Posted Mar 3, 2003
Hi Paulie, I'm a bit distracted today by work! Ha! The weekend was just beautiful but today the sky is grey and it looks like twilight at noon! There are many demands that pull in many directions all of which are mutually exclusive. Contracts, oversights, negotiations, pick-ups, drop-offs, future events, expectations, desires, needs, wishes, plans, lack of plans, dealing with jerks, dealing with nice persons, putting things off, getting things done sooner rather than later, walks, talks, eating, GSA cookies, payments, the price of gas, the need to service the car, the age and condition of the guy who does the work who has sort of become a friend, the dog ... you know, life. It has a kind of way of intruding upon everything else, no?
What will I be when I grow up? Resting I think!
You know, you are right to insist that you understand how it works not just that it works. Yeah you're right in your judgement that there are those who just don't seem to have any patience with anything or anybody that is not just like them or who just don't 'get' what to them is so darn obvious.
Well, I'm not sure I want to but I need to go deal with today's here and now, in my face demands. See you in a bit, okay?
? Posted Mar 11, 2003
A very busy weekend just went past. Later and later bedtimes and earlier and earlier rise times. Only now do I feel a little more able!
So, now, as promised, I'll attempt to speak with you on that post from elsewhere. Let me see if Delicia follows up over here. I think she just might. But, you never know, 'cause obviously, she has more engaging engagements currently. , c'est la vie...
You say: "My life is so incredibly mundane and drudgery right at this moment I could use the distraction. All these bills piling up, clients that take six weeks to pay me, and Jamie who has to have a new outfit for the slightest occasion. But she got a very good report card again and amazingly did a halfway acceptable job of straightening her room. I still hesitate to call it clean, especially where she can hear me, but there is a clear path through it to the pile of clothes that represent the major portion of my income for the last year or so that are laid out all over her extra bed. She really is spoiled totally rotten and I should try to get a handle on it but I'm just not up to it I guess." But you also said, and this is really important to remember the next time you get really upset with that untidy room: "The Beta Club is this national organization for kids who maintain high grades. If you slip below average for any length of time they kick you out supposedly. Anyway she's been in it a couple of years now and tonight she has some sort of speaking part in the ceremony, she hasn't really told me what it is."
Congratulations on Jamie doing so well. May she always bring joy in your life and may she not cause you to lose your temper as often as she now might! Do tell more details after the event. I'll hold you to it!!
Clearly, you love this youngest child of yours to bits. Clearly, you'll do almost anything for her. And you know what, that's as it needs to be. The problem is this, that it is really difficult for those of us who are this way to get our kids to learn to carry their own weight and even some of that of the family as a normal part of their existence, their routine. I know it is really difficult with my son. He has tremendous report cards, (he and his teammate just placed first in a major countywide math competition and one of his essays may get published), he is a joy for almost all of his teachers, he is a good runner (in spite of his asthma), he is kind and courteous with those he meets, even modest and reserved. But, at home, it is shout at him, yell at him, cajole him, pull your hair out, run round and round, to get the simplest of things done - things that he does without a second thought outside home. What is it that we are not doing right, dear God? If we spent less time arguing every little point and more coming up with a joint strategy on getting things moving smoothly forward instead....
Then you went on and said: "She talked me into taking her to get her eyebrows waxed today so she'll look good for the Beta Club Ceremony tonight. Then I was noticing yesterday how she has these stiff little hairs between her eyebrows. I asked her and sure enough she had shaved it there. Some silly relative of ours apparently gave her an "eye grooming" kit whatever the heck that is and it had a razor in it to shave between your eyebrows. When I find out which one it was I'm going to shave their eyebrows !"
I am so very grateful that obsessive grooming is one thing most boys don't have to get into. But, I can't tell you what a pain in the ass a beard is. What is the purpose of that stuff in all climates? Jeez!
You know, what you say about giving that relative an eyebrow shave, that's how I feel about the barber turned dental butcher who removed my wisdom teeth. If ever I get the chance I will relieve him of a few of his - no charge at all!!
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