Journal Entries
Absolutely over now
Posted Sep 3, 2001
My Decree Absolute came in the post today.
In November 1982 I first met my ex.
In April 1983 we fell in love and slept together for the first time.
In November 1983 we got engaged.
In April 1985 we were married. (My father was a clergyman, and it is his handwriting on my marriage certificate).
In 1995 we started to crumble.
On 25th August 1998 he told me he wanted a divorce.
But that September he decided he was no happier, and told me we were 'on' again.
1999 was a roller-coaster.
In January we made love for what was to be the last time.
In February he wanted to separate.
By the Summer we were 'on' again.
In September we split up (over the phone, one lunch-time - my bad timing); and although I did not know it he had a brief fling.
And in November he asked to get together again, promising he would talk about the problems and issues.
Throughout 2000 we talked, but did not talk.
And on 7th September 2000 we agreed to part for the last time.
This year we have both been with other people.
And now on the 3rd September 2001 my Decree Absolute is here on my doormat.
Discuss this Journal entry [8]
Latest reply: Sep 3, 2001
Absolutely over now
Posted Sep 3, 2001
My Decree Absolute came in the post today.
In November 1982 I first met my ex.
In April 1983 we fell in love and slept together for the first time.
In November 1983 we got engaged.
In April 1985 we were married. (My father was a clergyman, it is his handwriting on my marriage certificate).
In 1995 we started to crumble.
On 25th August 1998 he told me he wanted a divorce.
In September 1998 he bottled out and told me we were 'on' again.
In January 1999 we made love for what was to be the last time.
In February 1999 he wanted to separate.
In the Summer of 1999 we were 'on' again.
In September 1999 we split up (over the phone, one lunch-time - my bad timing); and although I did not know it he had a brief fling.
In November 1999 he asked to get together again, and he promised to talk about the problems and issues.
Throughout 2000 we talked, but did not talk.
On 7th September 2000 we agreed to part for the last time.
This year we have both been with other people.
And now on the 3rd September 2001 my Decree Absolute is here on my doormat.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Sep 3, 2001
Now and Then
Posted Aug 22, 2001
Do you remember that feeling of being in love?
Swimming in rivers of laughter,
Talking in the golden sunshine,
Playing in the landscapes of the heart?
Do you remember how the whole world smiled at us
And laughed at our laughter?
And all things were possible,
Everything was easy,
and even the dull grey things were fun?
Do you remember how we kissed?
Our souls dancing across the universe?
All of that was then, and this is now.
And the reason I remember, is hearing the freedom and laughter in your voice again.
And it is hard to wish you joy in your new love.
Discuss this Journal entry [9]
Latest reply: Aug 22, 2001
Sorrowing, sighing, bleeding dying...
Posted Aug 6, 2001
My hair is naturally what Joanna Lumley once described as 'english rat'. But I have been getting blonder and blonder with every visit to the hairdressers for a while. I had got as blonde as it was wise for me to go (ie, a darkish reddish blonde - none of your up-market ash blonde stuff).
In fact I was quite enjoying the colour, but I hate having roots.
I am also being careful with my cash just now - so no trips to the hairdressers for me. Off I go to Boots, and buy some dye...
...I suppose I will get used to being a dark brunette, with improbable aubergine highlights. 
Discuss this Journal entry [8]
Latest reply: Aug 6, 2001
Carbohydrates Cure the Blues
Posted Jul 28, 2001
I did actually start writing this sitting by myself in a cafe with a couple of slices of cheesecake and a pot of tea. (Well, they were small slices). By the time I finished it in the kitchen (eating sausages and drinking wine) I was feeling much better. So I think the moral of this tale is make sure you are not pre-menstrual at the time of the last date! The cheesecake, by the way, was excellent.
Carbohydrates Cure the Blues
You are not as independent as you thought, girl.
You thought that you could kiss and say goodbye;
But you are sitting in a café eating cheesecake,
And you're wondering why the music makes you cry?
You thought it was a harmless little fling, girl;
A way of passing time and having fun,
Never dreaming you'd be sitting in a café
Eating cheesecake with a pot of tea for one.
All you wanted was the nights out and the talk, girl,
And the evenings when you'd quiver at his touch;
But the cheesecake and the tea will never tell you
How the hell it is you miss him quite so much.
You knew you'd let it over-run its course, girl,
The evening he was kind and let you weep.
So now you're drinking tea, and eating cheesecake,
And you're wishing you'd not tumbled in so deep.
When you started it you knew that it would end, girl.
The last kiss was predicted by the first.
You thought that it would make you feel much better;
What a bugger that you're feeling so much worse.
But you know that it is time to look around, girl,
Even though you may be heart-sore for a while.
Now you've finished all the tea and all the cheesecake,
You'll find that thinking of the man still makes you smile. 
27 July 2001
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Latest reply: Jul 28, 2001
a girl called Ben
Researcher U148580
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