This is the Message Centre for Mudhooks

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Post 1

Taff Agent of kaos

hi

i asked about the suicide attempt because.....

i stopped someone this week

he was in the process of hanging himself

because the voices were telling him to

he paused before jumping off the chair

because i told him to stop, and he could see me so i was not another one of the voices,

just in time the cavalry arrived, hauled him down and took him to the medical centre

i wont post this on the open thread as its still a bit........!!!

smiley - bat


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Post 2

Mudhooks

I'm sorry to hear about your friend's pain. But I am glad you were able to help him. It is painful for you, too. smiley - hug I hope he gets the help he needs.

We lost a neighbour two weeks ago. We all thought it was suicide (he was still upset at the death of his wife 6 months ago) but it turned out to be a ruptured aorta. His loss wasn't any the less deep.


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Post 3

Mudhooks

I mean, as well, his loss to us wasn't any the less deep.


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Post 4

Taff Agent of kaos


he is not a friend

he is an inmate and was on an hourly check

he had been acting strange and i went to check on him 10 mins. early

saw what he was doing and summond help just in time

i feel so guilty and such a fraud

everyone was all full of praise for a 'good catch'

yet if i hadn't gone down early he would have done it and i would be the villain of the piece

smiley - bat


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Post 5

Mudhooks

You mustn't look at the "what if's". You did what you did and he survived.

You know, a few years ago, when I was working retail in a store in the downtown core, I was going to lunch with some friends. Beside the entrance to our store is a small set of stairs where the street people sit. They pee back there, sleep, drink...

That day, I looked and there was an aboriginal man sprawled on his back on the stairs. He didn't look right. I was going to stop and check to see if he was breathing and asked "Does he look like he's breathing?". My friends clanged over and said "Yeah, he looks okay..."

I second-guessed myself. I wondered all the way to Burger King and all the way back. When we arrived back, there were police and paramedics and he was on a gurney with a sheet pulled over his head.

I felt awful and to this day, I wonder IF... If he had been dead, the least I could have done was given him a bit of human dignity and called the police... IF he wasn't dead, I should have stopped and helped... IF I helped, would I have had the guts to do mouth to mouth... IF I had helped him, would it have been fair to instead of letting him go from what was obviously a terrible life....

Of course, the point is moot. I didn't stop. I will never know if he was already dead or if I would have been of any use.

What I DO kick myself over was not having had the common decency to stop and take the moment it would have taken to really look at him and see if he needed help.

You were where you were when you were needed and you did waht you did.... He is alive.


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Post 6

Mudhooks

Lol... "My friends clanged over"... They GLANCED over....


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Post 7

Taff Agent of kaos


yea i know the feelings i am having are a type of 'survivor guilt' because any sort of suicide atempt is a harsh form of emotional violence, i can rationalize that, the same as the what ifs,

it'll just take some time, thats all

smiley - bat


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Post 8

Taff Agent of kaos

and as its been the wee small hours of the morning hasn't helped.

getting light out now and the feelings are recedingsmiley - winkeye

smiley - bat


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Post 9

Ellen

Well, you thought you'd gotten away from prying eyes, but I am such a snoop! Sorry. As a suicide survivor, thought I'd just give you a shout out and say don't feel guilty. You trusted your intuition and did a good thing. Not your fault he was feeling psychotic (like I had been years ago).


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Post 10

Taff Agent of kaos

smiley - erm

next time i have too muchsmiley - alei'll probably have a little blubsmiley - cryand then everything will be back to normalsmiley - winkeye

smiley - bat


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Post 11

Ellen

A beer and a blub can be a good thing. smiley - ok


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Post 12

Taff Agent of kaos


work have made things worse........

i got a thank you letter and a small token of apreciation...£10

so now i am thinking!!!!!!!so thats the price of a human life £10

and

wow thats a precedent.......talk a vulnerable person up and then call for help....ker-ching £10 in the bank, do that 5 or 6 times a daysmiley - erm

not comfortable with it.....so what i am going to do is

co-workers leaving drinks on thursday.....£10 gets us all a jug of somethingsmiley - stiffdrinksmiley - strawberry....share the wealthsmiley - winkeye

smiley - bat


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Post 13

Ellen

Ooo, strawberry daquiris? Those are better than beer.

But yeh, I know what you mean.


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Post 14

Taff Agent of kaos

didn't think strawberry daquirissmiley - cheers, but theres no smiley and that was the closest i could get to smiley

smiley - bat


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Post 15

Ellen

smiley - laugh


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Post 16

Taff Agent of kaos

anothersmiley - moonin the smiley - biroover, time to smiley - runand smiley - sleepy

smiley - zzz the smiley - staraway and back to smiley - yikessmiley - fullmoon

smiley - ok

smiley - bat


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Post 17

Taff Agent of kaos

sorry for hijacking this away from yousmiley - erm

having chatted about it, i feel a whole lot better tonightsmiley - ok

smiley - bat


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Post 18

Ellen

Glad you're feeling better.


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Post 19

Taff Agent of kaos

thanks

i was trying to say sorry to mudhooks as we stole the message thread

smiley - bat


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Post 20

Mudhooks

No... quite all right. I'm glad you are feeling better, too.


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