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Taff Agent of kaos Started conversation Mar 27, 2010
hi
i asked about the suicide attempt because.....
i stopped someone this week
he was in the process of hanging himself
because the voices were telling him to
he paused before jumping off the chair
because i told him to stop, and he could see me so i was not another one of the voices,
just in time the cavalry arrived, hauled him down and took him to the medical centre
i wont post this on the open thread as its still a bit........!!!
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Mudhooks Posted Mar 27, 2010
I'm sorry to hear about your friend's pain. But I am glad you were able to help him. It is painful for you, too. I hope he gets the help he needs.
We lost a neighbour two weeks ago. We all thought it was suicide (he was still upset at the death of his wife 6 months ago) but it turned out to be a ruptured aorta. His loss wasn't any the less deep.
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Mudhooks Posted Mar 27, 2010
I mean, as well, his loss to us wasn't any the less deep.
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Taff Agent of kaos Posted Mar 27, 2010
he is not a friend
he is an inmate and was on an hourly check
he had been acting strange and i went to check on him 10 mins. early
saw what he was doing and summond help just in time
i feel so guilty and such a fraud
everyone was all full of praise for a 'good catch'
yet if i hadn't gone down early he would have done it and i would be the villain of the piece
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Mudhooks Posted Mar 27, 2010
You mustn't look at the "what if's". You did what you did and he survived.
You know, a few years ago, when I was working retail in a store in the downtown core, I was going to lunch with some friends. Beside the entrance to our store is a small set of stairs where the street people sit. They pee back there, sleep, drink...
That day, I looked and there was an aboriginal man sprawled on his back on the stairs. He didn't look right. I was going to stop and check to see if he was breathing and asked "Does he look like he's breathing?". My friends clanged over and said "Yeah, he looks okay..."
I second-guessed myself. I wondered all the way to Burger King and all the way back. When we arrived back, there were police and paramedics and he was on a gurney with a sheet pulled over his head.
I felt awful and to this day, I wonder IF... If he had been dead, the least I could have done was given him a bit of human dignity and called the police... IF he wasn't dead, I should have stopped and helped... IF I helped, would I have had the guts to do mouth to mouth... IF I had helped him, would it have been fair to instead of letting him go from what was obviously a terrible life....
Of course, the point is moot. I didn't stop. I will never know if he was already dead or if I would have been of any use.
What I DO kick myself over was not having had the common decency to stop and take the moment it would have taken to really look at him and see if he needed help.
You were where you were when you were needed and you did waht you did.... He is alive.
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Mudhooks Posted Mar 27, 2010
Lol... "My friends clanged over"... They GLANCED over....
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Taff Agent of kaos Posted Mar 27, 2010
yea i know the feelings i am having are a type of 'survivor guilt' because any sort of suicide atempt is a harsh form of emotional violence, i can rationalize that, the same as the what ifs,
it'll just take some time, thats all
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Taff Agent of kaos Posted Mar 27, 2010
and as its been the wee small hours of the morning hasn't helped.
getting light out now and the feelings are receding
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Ellen Posted Mar 27, 2010
Well, you thought you'd gotten away from prying eyes, but I am such a snoop! Sorry. As a suicide survivor, thought I'd just give you a shout out and say don't feel guilty. You trusted your intuition and did a good thing. Not your fault he was feeling psychotic (like I had been years ago).
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Taff Agent of kaos Posted Mar 27, 2010
work have made things worse........
i got a thank you letter and a small token of apreciation...£10
so now i am thinking!!!!!!!so thats the price of a human life £10
and
wow thats a precedent.......talk a vulnerable person up and then call for help....ker-ching £10 in the bank, do that 5 or 6 times a day
not comfortable with it.....so what i am going to do is
co-workers leaving drinks on thursday.....£10 gets us all a jug of something....share the wealth
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Ellen Posted Mar 27, 2010
Ooo, strawberry daquiris? Those are better than beer.
But yeh, I know what you mean.
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Taff Agent of kaos Posted Mar 27, 2010
didn't think strawberry daquiris, but theres no smiley and that was the closest i could get to smiley
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Mudhooks Posted Mar 28, 2010
No... quite all right. I'm glad you are feeling better, too.
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- 1: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 2: Mudhooks (Mar 27, 2010)
- 3: Mudhooks (Mar 27, 2010)
- 4: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 5: Mudhooks (Mar 27, 2010)
- 6: Mudhooks (Mar 27, 2010)
- 7: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 8: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 9: Ellen (Mar 27, 2010)
- 10: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 11: Ellen (Mar 27, 2010)
- 12: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 13: Ellen (Mar 27, 2010)
- 14: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 15: Ellen (Mar 27, 2010)
- 16: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 27, 2010)
- 17: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 28, 2010)
- 18: Ellen (Mar 28, 2010)
- 19: Taff Agent of kaos (Mar 28, 2010)
- 20: Mudhooks (Mar 28, 2010)
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