THE OLD PINK DOG BAR
The Old Pink Dog Bar is a rough bar in a grubby city in a run down planet on the wrong side of the galaxy. The bar is presided over by a large muscular arm that chose to remain in the bar when its owner, the original bouncer, died of presumably unnatural causes. The bar does not extend credit. It is exactly the type of place Ford Prefect would be comfortable being uncomfortable in, and also the type of place where he would be punished for running up a huge tab and attempting to pay for it with the American Express Card he aquired in an insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms still think digital watches are pretty neat-- our planet. Ford ran up this tab by the way, drinking Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters, the greatest cocktail in the known universe, which is bigger than you think. For more information on the universe, read The Hitchhikers Guide To the Galaxy.The Old Pink Dog Bar is also an equally fictional pub located in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada, a place alot of people have heard of, but few have ever been. It really exists(the bar, not the city) in the mind of The Old Pink Dog. It is perfect.
There are many things of inestimable value in the universe and a good bar is one of them. Which is why, in a city with few good bars, it is wise to carry one with you. Yet, the OPD is more than just a bar, as all truly excellent saloons prove to be. It is a place where ideas are exchanged, where deals are made, partners found and partners lost; where you can have a pint with a life-long friend whom you just met and may never see again. What makes this possible? The bar. A good bar is peace of mind distilled into a sweet nectar, bottled and sold by the hour. It is a comfort, a refuge, a mistress who asks nothing of you. It is where life becomes leisure. Concerns fade under barlight.
YOU STEP THROUGH THE BATWING DOORS AND SEE. . .
The Old Pink Dog
The Old Pink Dog is one of those cultural anthropologists who studies the human race from behind an 18 inch bar, part psychologist, part philosopher. You see, humans tend to think that if you are a purveyor of alcohol, you will be interested in any number of insignificant and uninteresting problems in their lives. Humans will also, when given alcoholic beverages, volunteer their most unoriginal, and baseless opinions to anyone within shouting or slurring distance, which often happens to be the lucky bartender. Thus the insights gained through the bartending profession tend to be very limited, since the drunken masses are largely of one mind, meaning that they share one.
The Old Pink Dog is a brooding Irish barman, which is the best kind. He dispenses leisure with ease, his smiles rare, but sincere. He knows what each of his customers drink. He knows their names, their favorite table, or stool at the bar. He listens attently, and then forgets. He takes pleasure in the company of his patrons. When not working, he is one of them. If you have ever laid down your life in front of or been ignored graciously by bar staff, you may be interested in checking in every now and then to the oldpinkdog himself. Don't worry the bark is always worse than the bite, except for maybe the pain, the ugly wound, the risk of a systemic infection leading to coma, or the chance you will end up chained to a tree screaming incoherently while spitting and foaming at the mouth in a rabid fury.
The Old Pink Dog decided long ago that if you allowed the world to guide your thinking it would lead you into a blind alley, and there you would get mugged by people who would convince you it was for your own good. And Y'all come back now, y'hear. The Old Pink Dog has spent most of the second half of his life, since reading most of the bible as an adolescent, trying to think for himself, and that is what this site is all about. You are free to disagree with any or all of his opinions, and he would rather you did than just accept them without examination. By creating this site, he aims to make you re-examine things you have just assumed and accepted, the things you have been taught from childhood. He wants you to think.
WHY? Simply because like every other kind of freedom, freedom to think for yourself is something that must be taken. While physical freedom, freedom of speech, and freedom of religion are all protected under the bill of rights, our intellectual freedom is constantly under attack by the very people and institutions that should ensure it. Humanity is the dominant natural force in the world for one reason only: we are intelligent. Well, most of us. Now, though, we must evolve ideas before our minds are eroded by the mass media that is motivated by greed to turn us into mindless consumer machines. We must be free from their influence. We must be free to think. Nobody is truly able to free him or herself totally from the ideas of others. We either reject or accept them, but once heard, they influence our decisions. It is important to make our decisions consciously. It is a trite saying that the unexamined life is not worth living, and while widely accepted, it is rarely followed. The world likes to take the simple truth, turn it into a cliche, and rob it of its impact. That does not make it less true. We are conditioned like lab rats not to stray from the path that leads to immediate gratification. We are told what to believe as children, and have this reinforced every day by the media that distracts us from thinking with self-propagating, mind-numbing drivel, the only theme of which seems to be the dangers of non-conformity.
I worked for an entire day to build this page, with lots of great pictures and links, but since off-site pictures are no longer allowed, it is not nearly as attractive as it was. Ignore the following sentences, because I changed internet providers, and have no webpage any longer, and my email address is also different. I am sorry for anyone who has tried to contact me for the last 2 years, I have been off-line, living. I will try to visit the guide more often. At any rate, for more about me, and for your own entertainment, go to
WHERE AM I FROM?I AM CANADIAN
I am an Irish lad from the great white North: Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada.
THE NOVELI am currently writing a novel set in Saskatchewan.
THE BARI tend bar for a living and I love everything about liquor but hangovers.
Alcohol is probably mentioned more often in The Guide than any other subject, and rightly so. The researchers have even put together an Ultimate Cocktail List, although it is far from comprehensive, believe me. There are hundreds of books, and many websites with drink recipes, and still you can walk into any bar in the world and get the bartender to make you a drink you have never heard of.
RULES FOR GIN AND TONICThese are the old pink dog's rules for making a good gin and tonic:
1.If you prefer (as I do), use a fresh, juicy wedge of lime, squeezed and rubbed around rim of glass, instead of lemon.
2.When in doubt, add more gin.
3.Load the short glass with ice.
5.Do not drink out of straw. If you think the glass is dirty, why make a drink in it?
6.see rule #2
THE 1ST LAW OF ICE CREAMThere are no bones in ice cream.
It's in the guide.
WAITRESSESNever trust a bar maid.
HOT LINKS (My Bookmarks)
THE FREEDOM FROM FAITH FOUNDATIONClick HEREfor enlightenment.
THE ZAPHODISTASThe Revolution starts HERE
1ST AND MAIN CHATThis is the only chatroom I visit.
BILL HICKSThe greatest philosopher comic.
ERNEST HEMINGWAYMy favorite writer.
JOHN MUIRThe great naturalist.
INDUSTRIAL SOCIETY AND ITS FUTUREBy Ted Kaczinski
MORE GREAT LINKSTHE OLD PINK DOG'S LINKS
MY FAVORITE RESEARCHERSCloviscat
Fenchurch M. Mercury
Wonko the Sane
Slainte!is gaelic for "To your health!" (It's pronounced as if you quickly slurred "It's a lawn chair!")
|Messages left for this Researcher||Posted|
|You’re Booked, oldpinkdog…||Aug 18, 2006|
|‘1st Law of Ice-Cream' - UnderGuide selection||Jul 27, 2006|
|your pub and the book||Jun 25, 2002|
|Wanna Join the Pack||Jul 30, 2001|
|Alchohol||Apr 27, 2001|
|Conversation Title||Latest Post||Latest Reply|
|There are bones in ICE cream !||May 12, 2009||May 31, 2015|
|Intelligent SF can you name some?||Jan 25, 2001||Mar 4, 2015|
|Trying to remember Drinkies||Mar 19, 2001||May 13, 2009|
|NEW INTRO||Jan 25, 2001||Mar 20, 2008|
|You’re Booked, oldpinkdog…||No Posting||Aug 18, 2006|
This user has no Entry subscriptions
oldpinkdog, Counselor of Alcoholic Culture Jammers(Banging their heads against the wall of willful ignorance)
Most Recent Edited Entries
- This user has not written any Edited Entries.
- 1st Law of Ice Cream (Joel's Observation) (UG
- 1st Law of Ice Cream (Joel's Observation)
- The Complete Index of AGG/GAG
- Project: Use and Abuse of Gin - (Ab)Users of
- Project: Use and Abuse of Gin
h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of Not Panicking Ltd. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."
oldpinkdog, Counselor of Alcoholic Culture Jammers(Banging their heads against the wall of willful ignorance) has no Friends
This user has no Bookmarks