Vexed Swede

I suppose it was only a matter of time before I became ensnared in this project. So here's what you can expect:

This researcher (Researcher 113997: 'Cruel Twist of Fate': Chris McDermott) is:-

a) a professional cardboard cut-out
b) yorkshireman by birth, yorkshire pudding by taste
c) not short, unless you count money, and if you count
money then you are an accountant
d) going to investigate the kind of problems that make
your hair curl, you brain ache and your bowels gurgle

Here's something to think about as you pick the bits between your horribly mis-shapen teeth....

Abundant Mesmeric Eminations: or How the World Turns
You what!? Good question. And all good answers are prompted by a "You what!?", so here's a good answer:

Abundant Mesmeric Eminations (AMEs) are my theory as to why the world turns, or to put it more exactly (because there are some very exacting people out there), AMEs are my explanation of how it is that we human beings manage to busy ourselves with floundering around in search of answers and then justify this search as any of the following laudable activities:

1. Religion
2. Philosophy
3. Art
4. Work
5. Science

All of the above are primarily dedicated to the pursuit of "answers".
My thoery of AMEs has this to say about such activities:

Statement 1: There's loads of us. We are abundant. We aim to be abundant.
Statement 2: We transmit our real aims/purpose/ideas primarily through intangible eminations.
Statement 3: We receive an abundance of subtle messages continually and some ideas subliminally take root.
Statement 4: We can't prevent ourselves from contributing to the subjects mentioned above.
Statement 5: None of our ideas are exclusively our own. Ergo: there can be no valid concept of "copyright", "patent" or "intellectual ownership".
Statement 6: I worked this out myself. It's my idea. So don't try and nick it.
Statement 7: The only pursuit worth devoting time to is not the pursuit of "heaven", "nirvana" or any other such transcendental state - but simply to become "AMEless".

With Love.
Cruel Twist of Fate.

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Cruel Twist of Fate

Researcher U113997

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