A Conversation for The Alternative Writing Workshop

A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

Post 1

ArizonIain

Entry: Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways. - A4001095
Author: ArizonIain - U1535223

I was pointed here after writing this "off the top of me head" ramble today. Any constructive ideas would be much appreciated as all the folk I know back in Blighty see each other down the pub or check their e-mails on a bi-annual basis. I need to find a vent for my inane random scenes aand I hope I may have found it! smiley - winkeye
Thanks for bothering in advance if that doesn't jerk quantum entanglment into the mix.
Cheers.


A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

Post 2

sprout

I think you may have found it. smiley - biggrin

I enjoyed this - nice writing style and some good gags - you could polish the ending a bit if you wanted, but it works for me.

smiley - cheers

sprout


A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

Post 3

U1250369

I enjoyed reading this and it made me laugh very quietly.

I am frightened of poisonous snakes and spiders so reading your story was akin to a rite of passage for me.smiley - erm


A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

Post 4

LL Waz

Loved it! Laughed out loud a couple of times. I liked the off hand "Oh yeah, and..." style mention of bears and lions at the end.

You've a handful of typos in there and a couple of misplaced 'postrophes, and, being really picky, 'around here' in two consecutive sentences that was a (tiny) hitch in the read.

"somewhere that has managed to exterminate almost anything living that can harm a human " all too true. Though I nearly jumped on an adder when running across rocks on a Welsh beach.

Welcome to h2g2 smiley - smiley. You haven't had the usual welcome message from one of the site's ACEs. I expect one will be along shortly but in the meantime just ask if you need any help finding your way around. h2g2's grown into a very big site.


A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

Post 5

ArizonIain

Thanks for the feedback. So for a first attempt while sitting doing a job utterly alien to me awaiting the birth of our fisrt child at the antique age of 40 ...it's not too bad then? As the last cumbrian cowboy I met said "Yippee-aye-ey-up!"
Cheers smiley - smileysmiley - ale


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A4001095 - Arizona Animules and their Wiley Ways.

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