h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: White Stuff Part 2 – A very Southern Nanouk explores - A46863066
Author: boots (keeper of the pink flipper) - U214221

Do we really have to suffer more of the same tomorrow?

I like the grouchy tone of this, but I didn't find it as amusing as your first 'White Stuff' piece.

Maybe I'm anti-car. It was nice to be able to trudge into our town yesterday without being nearly run over at every turn. The children were sledging in the street and having a great time.

There are a few awkward sentences in this piece.
In the first sentence, it's not clear whether it's the narrator or the neighbour who's doing the shovelling.
The sentence beginning "Work" gets tangled somewhere in the middle.
In the sentence beginning 'Actually', perhaps the 'it' at the end needs to be replaced by 'the snow'.

Thank you.
I'm a bit rusty I'm afraid, have been away from site for a while.
No apologies for the car, we all make our own choices, Man U v Chelsea, Good v evil, left V right. I celebrate the difference and embrace a country that allows the same.
Bit I really do appreciate your positive critique and agree with it.
Firstly, there probably should be an 'and' before the neighbour comes back in...I debated but didn't want the 'who' was shovelling to be too obvious.

Next bit, is this better?
Work, realising that I have enough to do at home to justify my paltry pay check has suspended the email bombardment. I know I will still have to go out there and suffer. The cat has to eat and rosemary and basil roll ups don’t have quite the same kick as a Silk Cut. (Not that thrilled with the Oates bit)

Last one possibly need two words taken off the end rather than 'snow' added
'Actually almost certainly on a double but as nothing bar the black gunge known as sludge is visible on the road, I think I would have a pretty good case in court even if there was a traffic warden vindictive enough to be out'
Do I know you in another persona or have we not met on this site before?
Will have a lurk, but thanks for the advice.
Take care
boots

Good to see you boots. Or good to hear your voice again .

I'd cut the Oates bit, doesn't reaaly fit the character to emulate an Arctic explorer. Not without some scathing comment on him, anyway.

You've put part 2 in the title so this might not be relevant, but the past shop owner background hangs a bit in the air when reading this as a stand alone. It's not needed to introduce Katie.

I think your proposed changes meet my comments, although you need a comma after 'pay check'.

Here, the snow has gone but we seem to be well on the way to getting floods instead. I'm not sure if it's an improvement