h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm always being challenged to.

Any suggestions?

You can do it like we do for painted Easter egg decorations:

Take a not too big metal knitting needle and carefully punch a hole in the top and bottom of the Egg, then put one hole to your mouth and blow hard. If the hole at the other side is big enough the yolk and egg white will come out of it.

get some liquid or powdered eggs

Get someone else to break the eggs!

<BB<

One book (from the laundry files) has an running joke about a side character trying to make an omelette without breaking the eggs

The last suggestion was to put extremely fine iron particles on the eggs, then use a strong enough magnet to force them to permeate through the shell of the egg - at that point a rotating magnetic field would "whisk" the egg, while a microwave could be used to cook it

I'll let someone else be the person who attempts this idea

I'm sure if you shake it very hard for long enough it turns into cheese.

There's a simple solution.

Walk down the frozen food aisle in Tesco's until you find the convenience foods.

http://gertsamtkunstwerk.typepad.co.uk/weblog/2010/03/readymade-omelettes.html

An alternate universe where unfertilised eggs don't have shells comes to mind but the difficulty of harvesting those yolk and white excretements calls for some thinkin'.

Not to mention the energy required to open the alternate universe just for an omelet.

Why not switch to grilled cheese sandwiches?

"the difficulty of harvesting those yolk and white excretements calls for some thinkin"

Ye cannae make an omelette wi'oot breakin' the laws o' fuzzuks, Cap'n.

If you wish to make an omelette from scratch, you must first invent the universe, eh?

No, just invent the scratch

Or, become a Vegan.

"Ingredients
6 ounces (1/2 package) Mori-nu lite silken tofu (or regular extra-firm silken tofu)
1 tablespoon soymilk
1 tablespoon nutritional yeast
1 tablespoon potato starch or cornstarch
1 teaspoon tahini
1/8 teaspoon onion powder
1/8 teaspoon turmeric
1/4-1/2 teaspoon salt, or to taste
1 pinch chipotle pepper or smoked paprika (optional)
1 pinch kala namak (black salt), optional (adds an eggy taste; look for it in Indian grocery stores)

Also needed:
Omelette filling of choice (have filling warm or at room temperature)"

http://blog.fatfreevegan.com/2007/09/vegan-omelette-for-one.html

I guess a bacon filling is out, then?

You can get Vegan bacon, believe it or not.


I think the pigs are fed a very strict diet or something.

"I think the pigs are fed a very strict diet or something."

And somehow that makes them a vegetable?

Is is kosher?

"And somehow that makes them a vegetable?"

You are what you eat

I think the hardest park is getting the butter and filling inside the egg.

I remember, when studying, we used magnetic stirrers to mix liquids. Maybe inject liquid butter and liquidised filling into the egg, insert the magnetic pellet inside and place on the stirring base to homogenise the egg then cook, rotating the egg to ensure it stays mixed, Then serve?

Do not microwave, unless some means of removing the magnet could be devised.



MMF

How can I make an Omelette without breaking any Eggs?

I think the answer is 42. You know this answer is very versatile it explains many many things.

Use a definition of "breaking" that is very specific, so that making an opening in the shell by any other means is perfectly fine. Semantics FTW.