h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

yup, somthing like that.

A quote that occurs to me here then is from a cartoon mouse;

'Oh, Job jolly well done then, Brain...'

lmao
rofl

Way to go ignoring my job application, Gigger-brain.

Come on, you must have a use for a physically fit 35 year old chemical engineer with excellent written and verbal communication skills, scoring in the top percentile in numerical and verbal reasoning according to independently administered tests and 167 on Mensa's entrance exam, with a clean credit rating, full driving licence, house, car, ten years process and environmental engineering design and commissioning experience across a range of industries including fine and bulk chemicals, paints, plastics, pharmaceuticals, food and nuclear energy, HTML skills, 60 wpm typing, a pilot's licence, who can ride a unicycle, juggle five tennis balls or three flaming torches, shoot a running man from 100 yards in a 30mph sidewind from a standing position, speak conversational French and Klingon, breathe concentrated CS gas without physical inconvenience, windsurf, snowboard, wakeboard, kitebuggy, surf, paraglide, play the didgeridoo WITH circular breathing, bench press 100kg, make delicious mozzarella meatballs, recite the entire script of the first Star Wars movie, stand on my hands for as long as you like, drink a pint of Guinness in three seconds flat and run a mile in five minutes?

Don't you?

H.

Well i don't, but i know a man who might...

Alas, I only have an IQ of 145, so I suppose this makes me a beta. The fact that I am incredibly tolerant of sexual deviancy no doubt puts me even further down with the epsilon semi morons.

allright alright,
i am not ignoring anyone, i have too many calls to the stack.
i do have a job for you if you really do know about chemicals.

obviously by now we have established i dont have the greatest education in the world, so bear with me.
isotonic water, you understand the point of said invention,
water that is better than water for the body.

i have an idea for a drink that makes your sweat evaporate more quickly, using ingredients allready very prevalant in the western fatty.
sorry not PC. i mean the western world who likes their food a little too much.
if you reply, i will explain the first draft theory?

In Bob's name is he still here!







Impressive credentials Hoo

'if you reply, i will explain the first draft theory?'

if you must ....

im sorry, did you get the impression iwas talking to you?
i mean Hoo, the guy that needs 2pieces of paper for his cv thankyou.

If he doesn't have an opening for you, I might!

if i do hire anyone who happened to read this days folly, then as a mesurable quantity,i would offer double current sallary minimum, but the flip side of the coin is that you then use your skills to best benefit the company and the general world around you.
that is roughly how it works.

'im sorry, did you get the impression iwas talking to you?'

Obviously. This is a public forum: you talk to everyone who is prepared to listen. Seeing as I was probably the only person who was, I suggest you treat me with a little less disdain.

i will talk to anyone who is willing to talk, and prove me wrong.
i do not really care for mockery though, damn waste of life if it is not constructive.

i think you will find i have been more than politte to those who deal with me constructivly, and look beyond the lack of academic to the principles behind my somtimes incorrect words.

Go on then. You have the floor.

I think it fair to warn you that you are talking to, among others, a
research scientist with a PhD in physical chemistry. And that if I find the idea completely ludicrous and risible, I will say so. As would anyone else in a position to do so.

Circular breathing, eh?

Well, if one good thing has come out of this lunacy it's that Ben is back with us. How are you, my dear? Let's talk about your Poetry! (sidles off in the manner of someone who has just been bored to death at a party my the Man with The Screwdrivers In His Pocket...)

fine. now i know it's a bit out there mixing technology fields and all that.
somthing the phd's of this world dont do very often.
first assume nano tech is a possibility,
if you dissagree, talk to the japs.
we are making magor breakthrought in medical regection technologies.
pure alcohol evaporates faster than human sweat.

with all this in mind here goes.

i believe it may be possible to manufacture artificial salt grains, or rather hollow containers that fool the body into thinking that it is salt.
these breakdown slowly, normaly after regection from the body.
now if you could fill these with a substance that evaporates as quickly as alchohol. now seal these containers with a substance that breaks down rapidly in uv or some thing.
you then suspend them in a drinkable uv filter(protects them before ingestion.)

now the plan would be to have the filter pass through the body but the false salt to remain.
it is secure enough to go through most of the motions of salt, but when it breaks the surface of the skin as sweat then it would crack open under the sun, releasing its alcohol or whatever.

Please, i know it has flaws, but if some serious brains took on this progect, then i bet some sort of reality could come of it with a big enough buget..

GiGaBaNE (of the 13th zodiac)

'Please, i know it has flaws'

Do you have any idea what the flaws might be? Such as the fact that when salt is ingested, is dissolves, becoming hydrated sodium cations and chloride anions? And salt grains don't float around in the bloodstream?

Don't give up the day job, there's a good lad. We don't want our roads to get dirty.

I am cool, thanks, FM. Thoroughly enjoying the floorshow.

GaGaBrain - what exactly is the point of this non-sweaty sweaty-stuff?

B