h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

related pH: when large stores (like b&Q) dont have a public toilet

PH: when students think UUC is great. Why do you think I'm here, for the kicks, hm? No, for the teaching I do not get there (teaching we should get but that's a different matter altogether)...

>>pH: when large stores (like b&Q) dont have a public toilet

pH: when large cities (like Paris) don't have a public toilet. What are we supposed to do?

Look harder.

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=paris+public+toilets&hl=en&client=safari&prmd=imvnsa&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=a5WIT-zCCuGQ0AX9toHiCQ&ved=0CFcQsAQ&biw=320&bih=417#p=0

When large cities (like Las Vegas) don't have public water fountains.

Well, if they will build large cities in such stupid places...

PH: "The largest ship the world had ever seen..."

Well, yeah. But when you bear in mind that this record was broken about once or twice a year at the time...

Titanic again, KB?

PH: when you've asked someone for help, they're taking a LONG time to get back to you and the deadline is May 23rd...

Aye, I'm afraid so. I'm tempted to join you in Poland to get a break from it.

Feel free! I've not heard it mentioned here yet! It's a big anniversary, but really, this is a bit of overkill.

Women knowing they're going to be sitting on a red sofa for morning TV who wear clashing reds or match exctly and blend in.

as well as anyone who wears a pattern that looks like it flickers when you see it on tv

*blinks*


I have probably already said this before, but here in Germany, all the supermarkets these days are re-arranging their departments so that you go past the vegetables when you go in. That means you have bananas and lettuces at the bottom of your trolley and then you have to load the washing powder and tins of tomatoes on top of them, or take everything out again and rearrange it to accommodate the other stuff.

I might take to going IN through the tills and OUT through the information desk.

There are some supermarkets in the UK that are arrange that way. The local Sainsbury and Morrisons spring to mind. Our local Tesco is more sensibly arranged. The fruit and veg. department is close to the tills, so you can generally arrange that it's the last area you visit before you leave.

The reason they do that is because if you load up on healthy stuff at the beginning of your shop, you are more likely to pick up unhealthy stuff later on. Retail psychology in action.

I don't care, I'd rather not have my oranges crushed. My local market does this too. I just criss cross the store when done and put oranges in last;. But it annoys me. Also annoying: ants. Even more annoying: when you freak out because you can't deal with the problem yourself.

Don't move into my room, please, I am already living there.

And a third PH for good measure: when you see photos of Facebook of everyone having a good time and you aren't there. And spending your birthday on your own. Hell with this, I'm going somewhere! Suggestions on the back of a postcard, please.

Grocery stores: Why don't you just start at the back and work your way to the front?

It's simple enough to avoid heavy things crushing fragile one, if you have one of those trolleys with a separate compartment in the front. Just load your eggs and strawberries in there, and plonk your heavy stuff in the main compartment later. I've never had a problem.

German trolleys don't have compartments. They don't have baby carriers, or places for them, except the seats for toddlers, which is where I keep my nor are there any for wheelchair users. Most of them have bits of string wrapped around the axles and are very difficult to steer. They deserve a PH award of their own.

You can't start at the back and work your way forwards because the tills and the entrance are both the same side of the shop. You'd have to start at the back and zig zag through the aisles (which run in the wrong direction) to cover everything, if you wanted to finish at the front.

As if lettuces, strawberries and mushrooms weren't fragile enough, I would also like to protest about the yoghurt, cream and desserts which are packed in plastic pots with silver foil lids. The lids are soon broken when a misplaced corner of another item pokes through them.

PROTEST ALL THE THINGS!

PH: How sodding difficult it is to get a hotel in Vienna, let alone figure out where the bus will drop you off (and I don't speak German but I think I'd be OK with just English).

PH 2: you ask "who might want to come with me if I do go" and no one responds.

PH 3: they're all away this week and I am the only one can't go. Come Monday, I'm staying away from Facebook.

Oh, and happy birthday to anyone who celebrates today!