h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

TC, that´s optics and you can´t help it. Different wavelengths, different focus. Red on blue means your eye has to jump to and fro because it can´t focus on both at the same time. Result - headache.

PH - the term "bank holiday".

I mean, who do the banks think they are? Do we call them "toybox holidays"? No, so why "bank" holidays? So a bank decides they don't work, and then the whole country must know about it and stop working as well? What's that now? Bankers go sneezing, everyone must get a handkerchief?

And the worst part is, no-one asked for my opinion whether the term should be kept either. You'd think Merriam-Webster would have called me? But no, no way. Mumble mumble.

The Webster isn´t the worst. Trying to type a letter to someone with a foreign name living somewhere else and microsod word insisting on outlandish spelling...grumble grumble.

And has Bill Gates ever consulted you? I'm sure he hasn't, the lazy badger.

I´m sure he tries and word won´t let him.

But honestly - have you ever tried to work with Excel and MathCad at the same time? When the result of your work it "Tuesday", consider yourself lucky. It could have been "Monday".

You don't have to take time off on the bank holidays... despite the constant cries of people who "know their rights" there is no automatic right to time off on public holidays at all. But I'll continue to enjoy putting my feet up while you go to work, okay?

We share our drive with the house opposite. As a shared drive, we both have equal access rights, but the people who live next door treat it as theirs. When people call on them, they are allowed to park on the drive, sometimes blocking our cars in. We ask people to park off the drive, so that both families can get in and out without any trouble. Next time my friend picks me up for a college tutorial, I'll ask her to park on the drive just to make a point.

The man in that house has a fairly powerful motorbike, which he only uses in dry weather. The problem is that when he starts it he leaves it running for several minutes before riding off. The engine is so powerful that it makes our windows vibrate. I know nothing about motorbikes, but surely running the engine like this is unnecessary.

Our next house is likely to be detached with a private drive. (If we're ever able to afford a house like that!)

(Motorbike question: depends on the bike - some older models do need a bit of warm-up time before setting off)

PH: the non=working radiators in my office - my fingers are freezing!

PH: people who complain about the strain and stress of *nearly* being made redundant but in the end getting to keep their jobs... I've been made redundant twice, and it doesn't get any easier, so I have no bloody sympathy whatsoever.

CD, the problem isn't the engine, it'll be the exhaust. Many motorcyclists replace their exhaust with a non standard race olny exhaust as it 'sounds better'.

I dunnmo Mr D. I'm being made redundant next week, and it doesn't bother me at all. I don't greatly like what I'm doing at the moment mind, which probably has an effect.

Does he leave said motorbike to it's own devices with the engine running CD?

If so, run out and jump on it, and ride it a few hundred metres from wher he left it.


He will only do it once!!!



GT

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Regarding the motorbike, I don't know its age but it doesn't look very old. Thinking about it, my neighbour does look like the type who would alter his 'bike to make it 'cooler'. I don't think he leaves it unattended and I couldn't ride off with it even if he did. I have enough trouble with an ordinary bike, never mind a powerful beast like his.

CD, do they have anything like TÜV/MOT/State Test in your part of the world? The friendly policeman responsible for your quarter can send your neighbour there. Open pipes are nice, but it´s not "cool" to be antisocial.
And don´t anybody get me wrong please - I AM a bike lover. And I DO know some Harleys and Ducatis need free pipes. But there are limits.

PH: bloody Facebook chain status things that try to make everyone feel guilty for not re-posting them... you know the ones: "Could everyone please post this as their status for one hour? Every day kittens are killed by people reading the Daily Mail. My hope is that in 2011 this will finally be stopped for the good of all kittenkind. So many millions of kittens have died pointless deaths that I cannot possibly mention them all. Please, if you have a heart and a soul and like to copy something someone else has written so you can pretend you really care, post this status.

GRRR !!! Finally getting a completely black 'My Conversations' page and then this pops up!!!!!

On the other hand, I often look forward to a splash of cheerful red - saves me from working for a minute or so