h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hey! It's tuesday- I can feel my mind warming up!

Trainers Only?

Sounds like a great idea to me

It's not just trainers, what about "t-shirts only" or "no smart trousers"?

I know of a club with a "no baseball caps" policy, I do think that that one should stay though.

What about a club with a "noone who will knock over someone elses drinks can come in" door policy?

Thanks for paying attention guys! (Slow response though!)
The reason I brought this subject to light was an incident that happened in a nottingham nightclub (mention no names and keep your mates!). Okay, the no trainers rule applied! So, I bought some shoes and took the old trainers in the new shoe box to the club (trainers never die!). Ocassional drinks led to more ocassional drinks and I eventually left the club without the box. Unbeknown to me the box was then discovered by security- "Oh! my god it's a bomb!" thought the meathead.
The Club was evacuated-
And the rest of the story lies in the realms of urban myth.

OK so not quite as good as the 'bomb' story but a friend of mine went ot a club with a 'no trainers' policy along with a few of his friends and was promtly refused entry. So a cunning plan was formed - all those with shoes, except one - would go into the club. The left over person with shoes would then go into the club after about five minutes under the guise of looking for his mates and collect the shoes of the people in there. Then bringing them back out again and distributing them to the trainer wearers. Good plan. Unfortunately foiled by one of the few alert bouncers in this country, leaving a group of shoeless clubbers inside.

Perhaps clubs could become like bowling alleys where you swap your trainers/shoes/wellies/sandals/clogs/slippers/waders/flippers/
whatever for approved footwear?

I'd rather die than sell out!

Yeah, dress codes serve a purpose - if only to guide me as to where not to go. Quite the opposite of Groucho Marx who said something like "I'd never join any club which would have me as a member".

I'm with Dr G. on this one. Nobody wants to find themselve in a club where the smell of freshly buffed brogues is all pervading, and you're surrounded by people out on a works "do" displaying their innate lack of dancing ability.

I have however been to a club where a reverse of the traditional door policy operated, on the basis that the scruffiest mosh meisters are a lot less dangerous than Trevor from sales after too many pints of lemonade top.

Absolutely - I've never understood dress codes and the like. I've been to many a club containing trainer wearing young people and had a good, friendly time with no hassles. Yet when I used to wait for the bus home opposite the Roxy in Sheffield late on a Friday or Saturday night (well pub closing time) the shiny shoes brigade were often merrily knocking the seven shades out of each other - and that was before they got in the club for another gallon of lager flavour fizzy water.

Boooooooo

Down with shiny shoes. The violence seems to contribute to their idea of a good night out.... Personally I don't want to wake up with bruised knuckles and a swollen eye unless I've been playing on the park swings again.

I'm sure that most cities have clubs where "lads" just won't be let in tho' - or at least where they'll be made to feel so out of place that they'll never come back.

Absolutely - it's just a matter of finding them.

If you live in a town though this can be problematic as some towns only provide late night entertainment of the shiny shoe variety - the only solution is to travel to the next town or to the city. I know quite a few people who are or have been in this boat, even some people who live in London (admittedly the more suburban parts), and I have been there myself (Leamington Spa - which since I moved away has had a club open which is garnering a national reputation - typical).

If you live in a big city then it generally isn't too much of a problem. However, some clubs misleadingly don't have a no trainers policy even though nobody inside is wearing trainers - or at least look like they aren't.

Perhaps some clubs should be forced to have a no trainers policy just so that I don't get suckered again.

Eeew.

Just imagine, harmlessly sauntering into a club in your scrubbiest pair of Dunlop Green Flash and finding out that you're the only person prepared to do the soft shoe shuffle.

I think I may be suffering a panic attack.....

Vlad.

Im not being weird but me and me mates did that years ago in a nightclub in Liverpool. Either that or it was using 2 backstage passes over and over again until all twelve of us were in the after gig party!?!!

The following could be a complete fabrication, I'll let you decide...

As an occasional trainer at the consultancy I work for, I found myself out for drinks with other fellow "trainers". Having had a skinful at the local meat markets, we wended our way to the town's hottest and only (and therefore the temperature can't be correctly callibrated) nightclub, whereupon we met the usual whistle and fluted gorillas at the door. The conversation went:

"Sorry, no trainers," said the gorilla on the left, with what we understood to be a wry smile.

"But we're not wearing trainers!" we replied in unison, one of us mumbling "arse" into his cigarette smoke.

"ahh, but, my sister was at your gaff the uvver day, and just told me she recognised you lot from the training course she was on, hee hee..." he was enjoying this and exhibited a surprising level of intelligence for a bouncer.

"but...but...you arse!" at which point he kicked the living crap out of all four of us.

Moral: don't deliver training courses and then expect to get into nightclubs - there are no exceptions to the 'no trainers' rule!

I wish it was a fabrication, but I'm not sure...

Sounds like a real knight club! You should remember to take along a lance next time. But, they probably have some ruling about "No suits of armour"!

I like the 'trainers only' idea

Yea! Like the office with 'dress down Friday'. How about it 'don't matter Tuesday'

Provided there is good conduct and payment for drink.

Walk in wearing black trainers.