h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The first one sounds good, I'll admit. The second one - well. and maybe some ladies can help us out here - doesn't the mere suggestion that you're trying a chat-up line give the impression that you're a sleaze who's only after a shag and automatically turn someone off? I speak as someone who's been out of the dating game for years, but still reckon I'd prefer a less adversarial approach. Anyway, Vlad, how're you and Bells getting on?

Hmmmm,
Apperiently I've offended. I apologize. This one of the thing I find frustrating with these message board thingies, its dificult to inflect a tone to your message. The above was very much tongue and cheek, albeit true. The first little bit was how I met my fiance a good seven years ago. the other two... well, they were part of a younger, more frivolous time, and were favourites of friends of mine. (the "kiss me its my birthday" was actually *stolen* from Tommy Smothers)

Webgeek is absolutely right, but there is a follow up if she still doesn't bite.....Pretent you're leaving, like he says the really nice looking girls are not used to people walking away from them. Say "I'm off now but thanks, you've really made my night, you're gorgeous. Bye " then kiss her on the hand or cheek. You will be pulled back as you walk away and given a big wet snog. Then you can say "Okay then I'll stay for a bit."

Believe it or not, the walking away thing would get my attention alot faster than the other ones. Most guys
tend to forget that women, for the most part, actually LIKE a bit of mystery, and that is exactly what you are
doing in that case. Alot of guys in bars (I used to work in one, so I have experience as both an attendee and
an observer) hang all over a girl, and it gets tired really fast. Introducing yourself, then walking away could
be the best approach. Come to think of it, I believe that I met one of my ex's that way. And there is the bonus
of not wasting more of your time than you have to. So my vote on that is, try it. You'd definately get my attention.

You remind me of a spanner - everytime I look at you I feel my nuts
tighten.


Or not?

The walking away thing was definately the most effective way of getting a woman to talk to you.

The other ones were, really hit and miss. You pretty much had to pick a real tart to make sure they worked. (again, this is my much younger, much more alcohol/hormone fuel days....)

Another entirely accidental "pick-up" method was to sit at the bar alone, and not realy talk to anyone, but still not look like you're out of place, or waiting for somebody. For some bizaar reason, more than a couple women wanted to know why a guy would be willing to go to a bar alone. Simple answer at the time for me was, that I'd end up running into someone I knew eventually.

Uh, no. Zebedee, that's bad. Very bad. But if you have to use a line, make it a funny one. If you can make a girl laugh, you've at least got her attention.....

Morning !!!!
Well with a wonderful offer like that - How could I refuse ??????!!!!!!
In for the kill with puppy dog eyes - I think not !!

Care to try something else ????

(By the way I don't blush easily !!)

Morning !!!!
Well with a wonderful offer like that - How could I refuse ??????!!!!!!
In for the kill with puppy dog eyes - I think not !!

Care to try something else ????

(By the way I don't blush easily !!)

What??!!

The puppy dog eyes didn't work? You're a hard woman!

OK.

*Says something charmingly self-deprecating and then glances away with a bashful half-grin*

Oh, by the way, Not-blushing really suits you!

Vlad.

Heh heh, we're in for a long night. I admit to felling a little voyeuristic, but it kinda gives me a perverse thrill. I'll just go and sit over here, just within earshot and watch the two of you as I pretend to read this newspaper (which is upside down...) By the way, CIG, I wasn't in the least offended, just putting a different point of view. If you want to indicate tongue-in-cheek, just put one of the smiley things <> you know, < : - ) > without the spaces

Dirty voyeur!

I can't believe you've cut holes in your paper!

Anyway, she never writes me, she never calls, never E-mails...*adopts Woody Allen tone of voice* I mean, whaddya think I am, crazy or something..I mean, this girl, she's driving me nuts, you know. You know what I'm saying Spiny? I guess some guys just have it and I don't, huh? I guess my mother was right and I shoulda just become a rabbi, you know...?

Vlad

Vladimir the Rabbi?! A little unlikely don't you think?

I did not cut the holes - the last guy left them. Maybe he got fed up watching the last guy waiting for the last girl to come back from the loo. I think this place has a big window in the ground floor ladies' toilet. Anyway, if she doesn't come back soon, I'll take off the false beard, glasses and fake wooden leg and we can both go and get shit-faced at the bar.

Just 5 more minutes, OK? Then I'll get the first round in.

She might come back...

Alright Vlad - mine's a beer - make it a double.

I'm back - sorry - alot of work to do
If you're buying a round - make mine a Baileys on ice

I'm back - sorry - alot of work to do
If you're buying a round - make mine a Baileys on ice

Saved by the bells! Hello Bells, don't mind me, I'm just playing gooseberry here, you know, trying to make sure that you and Vlad get on really well, erm, I'll just take my double beer over to the bar, and er, well... you two can get better acquainted ahem. Bye for now.

so where's my drink then ??

Has Vlad gone to sulk ???? (or something worse ????)

LOL!!!