h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

After yesterdays little escapade with aforementioned cockroaches I decided that I needed more than a high pitched girly scream and a size 11 shoe to defend myself from the cucaracha mafia as they are now being called. with this in mind I called in:


THE EXTERMINATOR!


who wasn´t available


so the next best thing?

THE TERRIFIYING CLEANING LADY WITH A CAN OF COCKROACH SPRAY!

so she sprays my room then proceeds to spray a line across where the door opens.

Me: whats that for

Cleaning lady: They will not cross that, so they will not come in

Me thinks: yea but what if they are already in they can´t get out trapped in a room with the cucaracha mafia scuttling about and waving their feelers madly at me *shivers*


I can just see it now:

Cucarachas: Hey gringo we will get you for this *waves feelers angrily*

Me: *standing on the bed screaching* But but but.... I never.... it wasn´t me..... have mercy!

Cucarachas: You english pig you will die for this *mad laughter and more mad feeler waving *

Me: *gulps, whimpers and sobs*

*shivers*

anyhoo there were no signs of scuttling beasties this morning *touches wood* so, fingers crossed *crosses everything to make sure*

on another note I saw that dog with the green bum again this morning, maybe it´s a sign

are you ok then cal?!

I think everything is where it should be yea

good good!!!

uni starts soon :D

are you still in spain?
holiday or work?

I understood he was on an under-cover mission, ... to break the Cucaracha Mafia. Cleverly disguised as a green-bummed

Have the Mafia actually made any demands, food, money, women?

*flips through the phone book looking for a lizard hit man*

pssssssssssssst Evangaline! try ferret as well...or find someone named malfoy and we'll turn him into a ferret....where did i put taht wand....

Frank Burns? Oh wait, he just had a ferret face.

I was looking for one of these in the phone book...
http://www.lpzoo.org/animals/FACTS/REPTILES/green_iguana.html

*Wonders if Cal could put up with lizards in his room*

well if you want a lizard you go to any gov't body and get one

Alchemist, I said lizard not snake.

cucarachas such a poetic word

Maybe I should right a song about cucarachas *presses key on piano* Laaaa *presses it again* la la la....


no, I wont dont worry *grins*

A song...

This thread reminds me of Milquetoast, the cockroach in the comic strip Outland.

Isn't there already a song about a cucaracha???


La cucaracha! La cucaracha!
No se puede caminar!!!
Por que le falta.. Por que le falta..
Marijuana para fumar!!


Disclaimer:
This thread does not condone insect drug abuse.

*sends Cal an extra shoe or several in case the bug spray lady wasn't right*

*dances around the stoned cucarachas with Jack*

*prints out tickets for "Cucarachas, the musical"*

Please, don't step on the cast...