h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Today I've been thinking about the dichotomy of life. The struggle between good and evil, truth and fiction, and why I feel so lazy and uninspired at the moment.
For the past year I have been making somewhat of an effort to get my head around the idea of being a Spiritual Master. I was given a tarot reading/psychic experience by an excellent bloke; the reading came out with stuff that noone would know, and I took it seriously. But at one point he mentioned the idea that I might be a Spiritual Master and I accepted it. But it was more like a penny dropping on a metaphysical level, and as the message sunk in, I began to consider the truth. All of us possess the knowledge about who we are, the meaning of life, and such like, but we have forgotten that we know it - over time and through generations we have constructed our reality so that we now feel apart from everything. Rather than a part of everything.
So I started to see why things are the way they are, and I started reading books to help me gain an understanding of what I already knew, but had forgotten I knew. My mind was coming to terms with the fundamentals, but the practical application within the present context remained a distant thought. Now things are changing, now I start to feel like I should be cultivating my knowledge, and sharing it with others... But being a human, I can still see that certain sacrifices may have to be made to truly fulfill the next grandest version of the next grandest vision I ever had about who I am. But the sacrifices I see are just perceptions of what might be, and speculation at best. For example, I smoke. I know it is bad for my health and I have given up before. But at present, the thought of giving up that, let alone anything else comes across as a fearful image. Despite me knowing better. And all fear is is False Evidence Appearing Real. I know all this, and yet I continue.
This is the dichotomy. My health and my living experience will change, but I need to make the change for the greatest good for my self. So why does it seem so difficult?