h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Make the most of this gym membership, that is. We finally decided to take the plunge, after both deciding we needed to do more stuff but not being able to find any options that we agreed would be viable for longer than a week (Mr Vip doesn't really do physically active sports, neither do I, actually, and walking is difficult as it would be a car drive to get to somewhere we'd want to walk which rather negates the point, in a way. And we wouldn't do it in the dark or bad weather, 'cause we're crap like that).

If you've made your way through that minefield of a sentence above, congratulations! You managed to follow our thought processes, which were about that chaotic.

Anyway. We've bought the membership, and have been having fun so far. I need to make some changes to my routine already, but that's OK and such things always need a bit of a shakedown initially. I'm also going to adapt it to get me more time in the swimming pool as I rather enjoy it.

But... gosh, it's posh. All the exercise machines have little slots in them for you to put a key with your programme of machines on it, and it automatically goes to the right speed, or indicates when you've done the corrent amount of reps. And the showers! They're all huge, and with stone tiles, and shower gel dispensers. They've even got those posh lockers with keypads, like the ones I managed to lock myself out of at the spa I visited last year on my sister-in-law's hen party.

Life keeps on throwing these little shocks at me. I keep on doing things that make me feel rather... above my station, if you catch my drift. Those who have met me will probably snigger, especially those of you who have seen the village where I was brought up, but hey. I spent a long time with enough money to get by but only because I was frugal and selective with what I spent. Being able to afford a posh gym membership is weird. Although, of course, that's more down to Mr Vip having been hard working and dedicated to his job for over a decade rather than my contribution to the communal pot.

But enough about my feelings of social inadequacy, this was supposed to be a reminder for me in the future that I mean to do this thing. *points at future self sternly*