h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

After much thinking on the subject, and a jolly hot cup of tea, here is what I think:

The perfect cup of tea requires the use of a teapot. Failing that try the following

Empty, and rinse the kettle.
Run the tap until fresh water comes through, you can tell this when that water turns colder
Fill kettle with water and start to heat
Pour the required amount of milk into a cup
When the water is boiling, drop the tea bag into the cup with the milk
Pour the boiling water slowly onto the tea bag, the tea bag should inflate as the hot water hits it.
Stir, squeeze and remove the teabag.

And never, repeat never use instant tea.
Instant Tea can only be described as something one would find in the devil's armpit.

I will go no further.


Lord Summerisle

I'm sure even the devil's armpit would reject such a putrid substance.

Oh, you guys..

..it´s a such a joy to hear people talk serious and qualified about the right way to prepare tea. I´m living in Germany and maybe you can imagine what that means for someone who loves tea like me - it´s a real diaspora.

There was this posting about the American way of making tea with a bag, a cup and warm water and that no American ever had a good cup of tea - well, if you order a cup of tea in any German restaurant, you will be asked which kind of tea, and that doesn´t means Earl Grey or Darjeeling but black tea or - hold your breath - HERBAL TEA! Mint or rose hip or even camomile! "Thanks, I´m not ill," you might say "so one black tea, please" and everything will be like the American way. Teadrinker´s purgatory, maybe I had sinned in a former life..

When making tea without a teapot, it is vitally important that the milk goes in last. Otherwise you have to put a lot more effort into making it stronger than something that has been passed by a gnat.

I prefer milk in first if it's from the pot. Heathen but who cares.

For students, you can get at least four cups of decent strength tea out of one tea bag when not using a pot. But, always avoid very, very cheap tea bags (fairly cheap is fine, but you know the ones I mean -brown or orange label, ugh). The tea you get from them appears bright to luminous orange.

As for foreign countries, it always amazes me when you ask for milk with your black tea that has been placed before you. There's always a look of agonised disbelief. As if you'd asked to sleep with their dog.

The bizzare one I saw was a girl who thought she was being just like me and being all english by putting milk in her tea, only it was blackcurrant flavoured black tea...
Urrrrgh
A still slightly shocked
Hxx

There can be no finer tribute to Douglas Adams than to use the internet the way it was meant to be used, i.e. to instruct the virtual world how to make a really good cup of tea. Now, while the introductory message explained the rudiments fairly well, the use of Earl Grey tea was recommended. I feel I should warn all tea novices that this effete behaviour should be practiced only by consenting adults, in private. As all self-respecting British and Irish tea drinkers know, the only acceptable tea is Builders Tea (so named because it is the preferred beverage of construction workers). This tea is so strong that you can stand a spoon up in it. It puts hairs on your chest. And it generates macho cliches.

The good news for people not resident in the UK or Ireland is that you can order proper tea (and proper teapots) online. Whittard is one source (the website [URL removed by moderator]includes some rather amusing animated tea making instructions), and it would be nice if researchers could recommend other websites. That's the good thing about the World Wide Web: no-one need be deprived of a really good cup of tea.

Mr T, I'm so glad there are others of our one letter monikers on the web! No, but truley, I'm glad to find that I am not deprivedof whittards after the sudden closure of our local branch. As for builders tea, you can purchase Ringtons Strong leaf tea or Scottish blend pyramids make a suitably strong cup. Which is what I'm just off to do now, with some ginger snap bicuits
hxx

just felt the strong need to reinforce comment about milk in after water: If you absolutely must make tea without a teapot, then you have to let it brew before adding the milk - the bulky proteins in milk severely hinder the diffusion process which allows the tea molecules their freedom within the cup. Add the milk first, and you are imprisoning the flavour.

ALSO: There are places in Germany where tea is appreciated, I can assure you. I am currently spending a year in Kaiserslautern, (as opposed to edinburgh) and there are two whole shops in the relatively small town dedicated to tea. Proper tea, herbal teas, oh, all the teas in the world. They sell it in leaves too )

But I do agree that milk to black tea is treated strangely - they cant do everything.

(of course, I have always been I die hard black no sugar man, but thats not the point)

Just a few other comments. I totally agree that if you are making tea in a cup then the milk should go in last otherwise you tend to get a stewed milky-paper flavour. Pour the just-boiling water from a height of a few inches above the cup so that the surface is broken and oxygen is introduced into the infusion. Squeeze the teabag (which should have puffed up as mentioned in a previous posting) against the side of the cup so that all the air is removed and stir around the cup. Now leave it well alone for a couple of minutes. Return to the cup and rotate the bag once more around the cup, squeeze the tea out of the bag and remove from the cup. Add milk and sugar according to your taste (but please, not too much milk!). Drink while piping hot. This really makes a good cup of tea. The unfortunate result is that I have to make all the tea in my house as my partner insists that we always have "Skelly tea."

This is a strong rich cup of tea with a rounded full flavour. I can't stand weak or milky tea. A saying of my Father's on weak tea comes back to me. "I thought there was a hair in my tea but it turned out there was a crack in the bottom of the cup."

The alternative method, and one which is my own preference is similar, but place the teabag into the cup first, then pour the boiling water over said teabag. Remove teabag and then add the required amount of milk.....
A small but vital variation.

Not exactly a variation - I just forgot to say that you put the teabag in first

Always a good idea, to start with putting the teabag in first.

Milk first or last is a dilemma. Putting the milk in after does cause the milk to scalded click of the image in the main posting to see, but adding the milk first often stop proper infusion.

The best infusion occurs when boiling water is poured directly onto the tea bag. It is tricky to do this when adding the milk first, but it is possible. Add the milk drop the tea bag onto and slowly pour the hot water directly onto the tea bag, a little above the cup as mentioned in the previous post. The bag should inflate and allow the boiling water to be poured onto the tea bag, and not allow the milk to get in the way.

I know it seems hard - but does make a jolly good cup of tea.

Putting the milk in last prevents the drinker from scalded lips/tongue.

Hmmm, my parents, in their infinite wisdom, have found a way around the cold milk/hot tea problem. As my sister always has hot milk for breakfast/tea, they simply 'borrow' a bit from the hot milk jug-thus maintaining temperature and hence taste.

Unfortunately, I have also discovered that my parents are impervious to heat, to the point where what seems like really hot tea to myself is in fact nowt but lukewarm yuk to themselves.

And never use whole milk for tea-far too creamy. I find that semi-skimmed or the skimmed stuff mellows taste without sacrificing to creaminess. But to use fresh milk or UHT milk in tea? I'm still not sure on that.

But of course, Assam tea (there is no comparison), loose leaf or bag, drop of skim. milk and sunset to watch on a summer's evening just makes for a good tea experience.

I think its near impossible to get as good a cup of tea made in the cup as in a pot. Here however is how i make it and why.

The first desision is what type of tea it is
If it is a black tea then you NEED boiling water for it to infuse properly, and thus milk must be added later.
The second point is not to use a Tea bag but Loose tea and a tea ball. Tea bags are fixed ammounts of tea, the tea ball will allow you to use the correct amount for your taste.
The tea should then be brewed for the correct ammout of time (for most black teas this is approx 3 minutes) adjust amount of tea to get required strength, not the brew time.
As the tea will now have cooled slightly,you can add your milk(if required) with out over scalding the milk.

For Green or Oolong tea, most people dont take milk, i however do with a few of them.

The same rules apply for using a tea ball and the correct ammount of tea
but these tea's should not be made with boiling water. The Water should be at approx 85c or 185F

Thus either the water can be added first at this temp, or milk can be added first and then sligtly hotter watter added to give a resultant mix at the 85c temperature for brewing tea.

Got asmiley now

Regarding fresh water for making Tea -
did you know that the Queen's tea is always made using bottled Malvern water? I keep meaning to buy some to see whether it really makes a difference. I can understand doing that in London, where the water tastes foul, but seemingly wherever she goes around the world, Malvern water goes too!

Didn't know that, thanks!