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Aggressive Passion

Post 1

Barton

Passive aggression has been described as the hallmark of the British experience, accurately or not. So, I present this observation of why those of us raised in the United States are so difficult to deal with.

We suffer from what I choose to call aggressive passion. That is we become so caught up in our passions that we tend to attack people with them. This seems to be an artifact of living in a representative democratic republic. We have no tradition of being ruled by those more educated and hereditarily 'more qualified' to rule. Therefore, we are not accustomed or trained to think of other people being the ones to make the decision while we wait to be told what is the new reality.

Thus we don't know that it is 'proper' to respect others ways because they aren't permitted to change them. We believe that if we have a new idea, it must be the greatest idea since the door hinge and everyone should be grateful to be shown the light. It just seems so much more 'right' to do it *this* way.

Societies developed along the European (and, yes, this is a grotesque generalization) model are only now beginning to recognize the freedom that has been offensively present in the US mindset almost from the beginning (if we can believe the various observations of us from before our revolutionary separation from England.)

We are so brash as to be boorish. We have no sense of listening to others. We force our ways on those we deal with. We have no respect for local customs. And so on.

We are, in short, aggressively passionate. This sort of behavior is charming and entertaining in young lovers, but they are expected to grow out of it and settle down into the community. It is laughed at in children who have yet to learn the 'proper' way to do things. It is excoriated in spoiled children who ruin the lives of those forced to associate with them and their parents. And, it is the American way of life.

Why aren't we liked, as a nation of comparatively wealthy travelers trampling on local customs to get a better snap shot? Partially, I suspect because traditionally, travelers would have been members of the upper class from their respective countries. They would have both the respect for local customs in countries (charming though wrong as they might be) and would have the absolute sense of superiority that placed them away from those they were forced to mix with. Thus the locals were not forced to deal with such travelers except in a formal commercial or regal relationship.

We, on the other hand, expect each and every person we meet to acknowledge our presence as an equal yet privileged (or superior -- aint paradox fun) person who really wants to share our freedoms (particularly of expression) with everyone in sight.

Some of us are more open than others and will be anxious to debate even in situations where debate is precisely what is not permitted., We react with contempt while they react with terror or simple shock. Why would anyone like us?

Well, we're friendly. We're loud. We're seemingly wealthy and eager to spend. We ignorant and easily gulled. And, we're natural clowns.

All I can suggest for those of you who find us unpleasant and offensive is that you sit back and pretend you are at the circus. View us as you would any clown show. Later, perhaps, you will reflect on what your laughter says about your culture, you will take away the message of the performance, and you will have had the chance that all comedic art gives you to evaluate your own life.

Of course, what we do is not art because it has no intent in that direction. We are the clowns. The real performers are those who attempt to deal with the affront we present. Do not be distracted by your laughter. Embrace the entire performance for its artistic content and *then* form your opinion of Americans.

Of course, we are different. Of course, we accuse you of that crime. Of course, we are short sighted and limited in our outlook. Of course, you are so filled with protocols and practices that you are confounded by our clowns' failure to even admit that such things exist, let alone that they are 'proper'.

I am the first to admit that we do not live in a classless society here, but the meaning and significance of 'class' is entirely different here and has a different function in our society.

So, beware! We do not consider aggressive passion to be a symptom of anything other than the 'right' way to do things. Shun us or laugh, take us in hand and arduously train us, use us to discomfort your friends and enemies without having to incur a great deal of blame. It really doesn't matter. If your culture demands accommodation then don't expect us to understand that or to even desire it. We are not hopeless but we are more self-assured in viewing ourselves as suitable judges of what 'should be.' We know how to accommodate but we do it in ways that are not going to be familiar or even respectful. Educate us kindly and we will behave as if we were initiates into a secret society, flattered to be show the mysteries of your culture though we will never fail to ask, why, at the least appropriate moment.

Why should you take the time and effort? I sure don't have a good reason. Unless you have a real reason to associate with us blind clowns, then it might be best to leave us alone. We will pass. We always will pass. We haven't the patience to stay and there's always something else for us to disrespect just down the road.

Think of us as a swarm of locusts who don't consume as much as might be expected and often seem to leave extra useful things behind them. You can't fight the swarm, you can only be certain to preserve what you cannot stand to have touched or modified.

Why should you even begin to put up with us? Why is the flooding of the Nile of benefit to Egypt? Why not build dikes to contain the spring waters?

I do not claim that we are in any way necessary to you, but we can be beneficial and we are nearly inevitable, at this time. Please try to cope just as we try to cope with those who do the same to us.

On the other hand, please don't hesitate to tell us we are treading on holy ground and should remove our shoes, at the very least. While we may seem condescending, most of us are also very compliant on an individual basis.

That's my first pass. More later.

Barton


Aggressive Passion

Post 2

abbi normal "Putting on the Ritz" with Dr Frankenstein

Wow. The ugly American huh?

Well I think and hope there are more of a variety of personalities than you speak of.

Using the phrase "aggressive passion" you do make some interesting points.

How and why did you come to write this?
Are you disgusted? Are you are surprised?
Do you consider the majority of Americans to be like this-
or the majority of Americans on this site?

I suppose non Americans could best comment on your reflections.
Do you think a mass exudos from this site has to do with this?
I have wondered about thatsmiley - sadface


Aggressive Passion

Post 3

Barton

I'm not sure about a mass exodus, largely because there are no figures available about how many were and how many are actively using the site.

One of us did a statistical examination a while back and found a remarkably low number of active researchers. Management has never confirmed or denied, to my knowledge. The only figures quoted have been the total number of people registered since the site began.

I would be interested in seeing the actual figures as well as some statistics on words per active researcher in the guide.

I'd also be interested in seeing if one of my earlier conjectures, that the community provides the right kind of encouragement for those who want to add to the edited entries.

I wrote this because the phrase 'aggressive passion' came to me while considering 'passive aggression' in another thread from Krispy. Since we had speculated about the abundance of passive aggression in UK society, I found myself speculating about aggressive passion and how that phrase seemed very American.

There is much to be said against anything aggressive even when that aggression is expressed through passion. Is the concept real? I don't know. I just made it up because it seemed to fit. Think of it as an extended metaphor and not as psychological evaluation.

Generalizations are always suspect (generalization) and almost always shown to be wrong in the specific and more or less correct in the statistical senses.

Some time I will write something about the tyranny of the normal distribution curve and how it has shaped our societies. But that would be a chore when the title really says all there is about it (Unless I find the opposite to be the case.)

Barton


Aggressive Passion

Post 4

Barton

There *is* a fundamental difference in the expectations of Americans verus those of European countries. It comes from the philosophy of the US Constitution and more obviously from the Declaration of Independence where it is decreed that all people are entitled to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

True or false, that is the basic expectation of US citizens and it is at odds with traditional European thinking.

It is both hippocritical and ideal. But, US rhetoric proceeds from that fundamental viewpoint and leads to much more than a political distinction between people from the US and from the UK. That philosophical distinction can easily be argued to be the basis of most of our misunderstandings and social differences.

Barton


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