h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

And Mourinho is linked to being out next manager.



Disaster of a season. On that Liverpool game we managed to lose 5-4 after leading 4-5.< grr>

The Mourinho link is probably the ultimate humiliation.

Even though it's Mourinho almost certainly linking himself with Arsenal rather than the other way round the fact that it's in the press is profoundly depressing.

Surely, we'll never stoop that low.

Will we?

Jack, I think it depends how we do against Leicester.

Two weeks is a long time to wait with itchy fingers on the trigger.

But we're guaranteed to lose to Leicester, Mac.

Are you saying that within a fortnight Mourinho will have got his filthy paws on to our club?

If not him, someone else.

Another stunning performance yesterday.

We are clearly never going to hang on to a lead ever again.

The only time we've done so in recent weeks was in the first game against Vitoria when we took the lead with the last kick of the game.

Maybe that should be our tactics in future. Play for a nil-nil draw until there's five seconds of injury time left. Then launch the ball into the box to see if we can get a winner.

It might be the only way we will ever get a win.

Rodgers is going to well, his name on us.

Hard to believe we were feeling bullish going into the last international break, Mac.

International breaks are undoubtedly designed to undermine us.

And look... here comes another one.

So we're almost certainly going to get worse.

That might sound impossible but you can put your shirt on it. We're heading for relegation.

That's what happens to a team with a minus goal difference, right?

Already supporters of the Manchester Comedy Club have been texting me with predictions that they'll be ahead of us soon.

When Solskjaer's hapless bunch of clowns are on a par with you, it's time to accept that you've got no future.

Jack, Solsjkaer's bunch of misfits and journeymen are now only a point behind.

If that wasn't enough for Emery to get the boot then having our goal difference as lowly as it is should be.

At the Aviva stadium last night the bloke beside me asked if I'd ever seen Christian Eriksen play so anonymously.

I said 'every game he's played for Spurs since last Christmas'.

Even on bad nights we at least have Spurs to mock.

QED.

Pochettino sacked!

Poch sacked.

Mourinho in talks.

Mourinho confirmed.

At least we don't have to consider supporting him now.

I suppose we'll have the inevitable Mourinho sacking to look forward to eventually because he's the ultimate short term manager so there will be plenty of Spurs-based comedy to look forward to.

Unfortunately he is usually successful for a while before that happens so we also have the nightmarish prospect of Spurs winning silverware to look forward to as well.

Silverware, Mac. Spurs!!

It's unthinkable.

Jack, how can the Universe be so satisfied with the natural order of things being completely disrupted?

The universe itself is breaking all the natural laws of physics.

At least we have the theory of a multiverse to consider, Mac. There may well be a universe out there that is more acceptable. All we need to do is find a way to get there....

Normally from the programmes I have seen is some speedster messing about with time lines.

I an blaming all the nonsense this season on the Flash.

There's been a lot of nonsense, Mac.

That abysmal effort on Saturday was as bad as anything we've ever seen. This is an epic form of crapness, possibly even worse than the 92/93 league season in which George Graham led us to an undignified tenth place finish.

A 96th minute equaliser against a team that lost 9-0 just three weeks ago. At home.

I'm tempted to say that it can't get any worse but I suspect that it will. Much worse.

Jack it was even worse in 94/94. That's the level of craptitude we are aiming at currently.

No team for a second lets up going at us because they all know they will get through what is allegedly describe as a defence.

How Southampton failed wrapping the game up is baffling.

It has to end with Emery getting the boot surely?