h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*smiles seductively*

Well. just one - if you insist!

*'nette relaxes on the chesterfield- which appears our of nowhere*

*'nette ~coyly~*
wel if you insist...
but i've go to ge soon...

*'nette looks round and realises that Engländer is avoiding her flounces out*

I'll be back

*exits to sound of Treorchy male voice choir singing "Legionairres Drinking Song"*

*'nette awakes*
thanks Engländer...........is it morning?
I must fly
*departs to sound of Welsh male moice choir singing "legionairres drinking song*

*Engländer walks through the place, looking for the odd lego part, thinking of a haloween dream he has had and the question where all the spiders have gone...*

Where have all the spiders gone...

dadi dadi dadi daa

*Sound trails of into the attic*

This is a test, let's see if it works....

How did that ^ end up here?

I want to join, and here's my first rant....

I live in a country where the people have just re-elected a national leader whose main talents seem to be lying, grovelling to George W. B**h and grinning idiotically! Mind you, what can you expect from a place where the most popular TV shows are brain-dead 'reality' shows (so dumb it's unreal), the most popular 'newspapers' are either sub-literate celebrity smut sheets, xenophobic fascist garbage or both of the above, and the current Number One pop single is a ing ringtone! I go out and see lots of British people wearing shirts with the names of American cities and/or sports teams that they know -all about - if they think America is so why don't they go there, buy guns and shoot each other? Then at least I wouldn't have to listen to their ing awful gansta rap blasting out of car stereos modelled on Disaster Area's PA systems! I'm sick of living in a dumbed-down, numbed-out corporate franchise of a !

Most of all, though, I'm ed off because I'm brilliant, gorgeous, lovely and modest, but still inexplicably poor and single! Sign me up now - I need to rant or my brain will explode!

(Pub customers wearing American sportswear and carrying rolled-up copies of 'The Sun' begin to advance menacingly on Ormondroyd).

Er... , guys! It's the fault of Madman's coding - that was meant for the Ranters' Society page!