h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The first sign was during my summer vacation. This colleague has been my back up before. We looked through hir print screen printouts from previous summers, and I confirmed that yes, the routines are still the same.

And then I get a 'PANIC!' SMS from hir.
Turned out X had gotten two completely different instructions mixed up and complained to our mutual boss that 'everything is completely different and not at all same like X (me) told her'.

Well, it didn't take long to figure that out. I was a bit confused though, because not only did X have her own notes, but also a written instruction in an Excel file where you fill in server capacity used up Monday-Friday.

Ah well, I didn't pay it much thought, until this autumn, when we were comparing our current office to our previous one and, when I complained about a specific detail about the old office, X said, with a shrug 'well, it was only for a short time' sounding very sure of hirself.

I replied that no, it had started when we got another new member of staff that needed hir own office. X immediately backed off, claiming she 'never knew the details anyway'. Sitting just a few rooms down the corridor?

Ah well, anyone can be mistaken I thought.

Until a few days ago, when X told me and a mutual colleague about this great documentary she had watched.

Tonight, I managed to find the documentary online on the svtplay site (only viewable from Sweden, I think) and X had gotten so many details wrong (including the nationality of the main character) - and also probably merged hir memory of it with details from other documentaries - that I can't list the details, the list would be far too long.

All in all, to me it seems as if X has problems with both hir short time and long time memory, and that worries me.

And yes, I've got the actual documentary at hand.

Just to prove to myself that I'm not imagining or making things up. And I'm not.

But, most importantly, how do I proceed from here?

Do I talk to my colleague directly?

Do I talk to our mutual boss?

Because there *is something wrong with X.

That does sound distressing. How old is she? Is there a human resource person of some kind who cold evaluate her and determine if she is able to do her job properly?

I can only ask myself what I would want if it was me who was having memory problems and the only thing I definitely come up with is that I would want straightforwardness and preferably from a professional mind person. In other words, in a working situation, where you are thrown together and not there together by choice, I think it is best to not approach her yourself UNLESS you are pals, then it would actually be better if you did it and not some health care provider. And if the health care person or persons at your company is not that good maybe it would be best to send your coworker an anonymous note asking her to go to a psyche person on her own to check out the problem - there are herbs and exercises to tune our minds up and stress can cause problems too. It is a well-known fact that the airhead ditzy blond personality is often a symptom of having been abused - it causes mental panic.

Sorry, hadn't finished my thought.

So it may well be that she does not have a failing memory and any or all that that implies, but that she is suffering from some sort of emotional stress or maybe even physical imbalance.

It would be terrible if she were to lose her job at such a time as when she probably needs it more than ever. Of course, her performance needs to be up to the job and that's why it really is important that she look into some help.

I am only stressing the approach here, that if you have the attitude that it may just be a need for a "tuneup" or some tests on chemical and nutritional makeup, then you will convey that instead of some huge panicky message about her losing her mind or some such.

I agree with clare. This could have so many reasons. She may be losing her marbles, but she may just have something else on her mind. I was wondering if you could maybe do something together privately, like a pub quiz, or something. That way, you would be able to ascertain what sort of things she is forgetting, and she might be aware of it herself.

Otherwise, you will probably just have to find tactful ways within the work situation of showing her that her memory isn't working properly, by keeping records of things so that you can show her that her memory of it is confused.

Could this perhaps be related to the dyspraxia that Z described in his journal?

Either way, the only person who can do anything about it is herself, so your job is to point it out to her and leave the rest up to her. Keep an eye on how it develops and step in tactfully if you think she is about to create a big mess-up.