h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Will the earth move?

Where would it go?

To slow server heaven.

What has gone wrong. For a while everything sped up to glide time and now it is back to snail time.

It's going fairly fast for me....I think!

I blame yesterday's hemisphere, the northern.

The sooner TDV relocates downunder the better.

Better weather. Nicer houses. Little commuting. motivated, cheerful, skilled staff. Clean air. Great beaches. Excellent schools. Pleasant, healthy working conditions. Efficient public utilities. Speedy internet service to the world provided by ISPs who can cope. All modern home/business services ordered, installed and up and running in 24 hours. Nostalgic trips back home in 24 hours.

And most important of all, great beer.

Yes, what a vision... ah... makes one think.

Oh yes, and the great links to the outside world. *ahem* ... right.

Here's an intersting sight: http://www.h2g2.com/U

It is true Anonymouse. The largest capacity underwater fibre optic cable ever laid is nearing Hawaii as we speak.

It originates in Australia, goes to NZ, then Fiji, Hawaii and finally Mainland USA.

At a cost of $US800 million it is jointly owned by Telecoms in Aus, NZ and America and will be in service next year.

A clue to its initial capacity. All 3.8 million New Zealanders could be connected permanently 24 hours a day, 365 days a year and would be barely noticed. It is designed to carry even more digital traffic as and when required.

Will it bring prices down. We can always dream.

All right that tears it! The bl**dy telcos done hijacked my submarine!

Let me guess. Yours was the green submarine. The one with pictures of John Kennedy and Marilyn Munroe posing beside the conning tower. Have you still got the sheets?

No wonder Cuba won the peace.

Of course not! Mine was the blue one with the huge spool of cable on the back that was running [top secret] from an island known as [top secret] to both the US and AU.

It was last heard from nearly three years ago, btw...and we wondered where the thing went! Now there's proof positive in Echelon!

Mouse, check a map. This latest, majority NZ financed, cable laying excercise travels in a fish hook direction. Your boring, regimated echelon jaunt was destined to end in failure and tears.

Tectonic is the word to avoid my friend

*blinks* ... You didn't think hijackers would actually let the thing continue it's original mission, did you??

highjackers?

Where?!

In my submarine! *pout*

But as I was reminded as I spread word (to other concerned parties) that it had been found and what it was up to... "At least it's being put to good use."

Who by - Davy Jones, King Neptune, Moby Dick?

I've heard he has become rather desperate lately, sir Jones

I've got a yellow submarine with flying monkeys bouncing off all the walls...occasionaly they turn into pigs