h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi H2G2ers,

You've heard those cringeworthy flirty compliments on holidays and the like; "Your smile is as bright as the midday sun".

Bleurgh!!

Well, I'd like to invite you to come up with your own, funnier and quite frankly, barmy compliments for me to use on holiday!!!!

I'll start the ball rolling;

"Your eyes sparkle like shattered glass at the side of the main road"

Have Fun,

Your Ever Humble Servant,

KMA winner Neri Aracro

I used to be attracted to you

Depends on who it's said to but this starts bunches of conversations if you were to just walk up to a relative and say it

Very Good!

You know I think you would look smashing with a handlebar moustache!

(pref said to a lady)

I quite like
"your eyes are like p*ssholes in the snow"

Your eyes are like two glass marbles.... er... they are real, aren't they?


Geggs

*giggling*

I was giggling...then I realized that going up to somebody and nonstop-until-you-fall-to-the-floor giggling would be particularly annoying.

I love your new mustache...definetly said to a lady.

*goes to search the World According to Garp*...sure there's some in there

"Your lips are as red as a baboon's backside"

"Your smile shines like the glare from a bald man's head"

"You smell like monkey wee and your face makes me angry. Here, I've picked you some poseys."